


The Enemy Within

by JolinarJackson



Series: Mosaic 'verse [2]
Category: Torchwood
Genre: Explicit Language, F/M, M/M, Mildly Dubious Consent
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-21
Updated: 2014-10-09
Packaged: 2018-02-18 07:23:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 17
Words: 39,876
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2339966
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JolinarJackson/pseuds/JolinarJackson
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Following Ianto's betrayal, Jack thinks that the team may be broken for good. He tries to heal the mental wounds while being unable to quite forgive Ianto himself. When the team is faced with a threat using mental powers to gain access to Torchwood, none of them realize that the enemy is already among them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Spoiler: Day One, Cyberwoman   
> Setting: after Cyberwoman  
> Warnings: Language, really short dub-con (kissing) but nothing beyond the boundaries of the show  
> Author's Note: Written for the Torchwood Big Bang 2010. The lyrics Ianto recites are from the Welsh song Myfanwy by Joseph Parry and mean “Why is it anger, o Myfanwy, that fills your eyes so dark and clear?”.  
> Beta: danian helped me out with the English version and Vistin took care of the German version. Both of them pointed out flaws in the plot, thus improving the story. Thank you!

**1.**

 

It was silent in the archives when Jack Harkness entered. He looked around the large, dimly lit room with the plain concrete walls, taking in the rows of shelves and filing cabinets from different periods of time. So many years, so many secrets – all labelled and put away into storage. Some of those boxes were likely to never see the light of day again. Jack wasn't down here often. This was Ianto's realm, where he spent every second he could spare sorting through the files, trying to establish some kind of order in a room that had been neglected for decades. Jack remembered that this was the place where he and Ianto had kissed for the first time several weeks ago, back when Suzie had still been with them and Lisa had been nothing more than Ianto's dark and dangerous secret in the basement of the underground complex. 

Jack pushed away the feeling of betrayal that enveloped him every time he thought about the cyberwoman that had nearly killed them all, then tracked down his wayward archivist. 

Ianto was crouching between two shelves, sorting through dusty boxes. Jack shoved his hands into his trouser pockets and took in the tired hunch of Ianto's shoulders. The tense posture and the exhaustion marring the handsome face. Ever since Jack had been forced to order the Torchwood team to shoot Lisa Ianto was fading into the background. Of course he'd always been there. The perfect assistant, quiet, dutiful and quick. But he'd always smiled and he'd always been willing to share a joke with the team. Now, he was just there, like a shadow, doing his work but nothing beyond that, still grieving for his girlfriend. Jack would have never guessed that Ianto was hiding such a tortured soul behind his gentle manners and quick wit. Of course he'd assumed that there was some mental scarring from the attack that had destroyed Torchwood One and killed so many of his colleagues and friends. It was a miracle that Ianto had survived. But he'd never before let the team see how painful the memories were. 

Jack liked to think that Ianto understood why he'd had killed Lisa. That he understood that the girl he'd fallen in love with, had died during the downfall of Torchwood London, the battle of Canary Wharf. That he understood that the half-converted thing he'd secretly kept alive in Torchwood Three's basement had been a killer, a machine, hiding behind the mask of Lisa Hallett.

Jack cleared his throat softly. “You missed lunch.“ 

Ianto looked up at him, no surprise in his blue eyes. He must have heard him coming. “No. I brought it into the Hub for you, remember?“ 

Jack rolled his eyes. “You missed eating lunch with us.“ 

Ianto straightened and gave Jack a fake smile. “I was busy down here.“

“Please tell me you ate.“

“I did, sir.“

“Good,“ Jack answered. “Starving yourself isn't going to help you.“

Ianto ducked his head and sighed deeply. “I know that.“

“Hiding down here won't either.“

Ianto looked up at him with an expression Jack couldn't read. His blue eyes were just as masked as the rest of his pale face. “I didn't think I would be missed.“

“You weren't,“ Jack answered curtly. “But you still have to work with us.“

“Really?“ Ianto asked. “It's been five weeks. When will I get my punishment?“

“You had a suspension, Ianto.“

Ianto smiled. “That was your punishment. I was talking about UNIT.“

Jack shrugged, not really caring about UNIT. He never had. UNIT seemed to think that it owned Torchwood. Policies forced Jack to work with them but he wasn't fond of them. 

He looked around curiously. “So, how's it going?“

Ianto looked down at the boxes to his feet, accepting Jack's unspoken wish to change the topic. They'd been civil with each other ever since Lisa but that was about it. Jack wasn't flirting any more and he certainly didn't touch Ianto. Jack used touches as easily as words, there were things he conveyed with his touch that words could never say. His touch could be calming, consoling and praising or punishing, aggressive … and excluding. He was touching Gwen and Tosh – an arm around their shoulders when he was going through their work with them, hugs when they weren't feeling well – and even Owen accepted the casual pats on the shoulder Jack gave him in passing. 

It had been a while since Jack had put a hand on the small of Ianto's back to guide him into his office when they were going through Jack's to-do list for the day. 

It had stopped with the aftermath of Lisa trying to take over Torchwood. Ianto would have never thought that he'd come to miss Jack's affection so much. But he knew that he deserved it. He'd used Jack in the worst possible way. It had started out so innocently with some flirting and smiling … and before Ianto knew it, he'd had to find a way to keep Jack from checking out the generator in the basement after he'd accidentally routed all the power to Lisa's room just a week after he'd hidden her down there. It had been just him and Jack, the memory of the almost chaste kiss Jack had given him in the archives a day before and desperation. The blowjob had been hurried and a bit clumsy but it seemed to have worked. Jack had forgotten to check the basement after he'd come down from his sex-induced high. 

A few days later, when Jack had kissed Ianto in the Hub after sending everyone home and suggesting that he should stay the night, Ianto hadn't turned him down because it was the perfect distraction. 

Too bad that, after weeks of casual encounters and one night stands, Ianto began to actually feel something for Jack who was a much more gentle lover than he'd anticipated. That didn't change the fact that Ianto had used him. 

Ianto looked down into the boxes. “Actually, I found some things that weren't properly labelled and the files are incomplete.“ 

Jack stepped closer and looked down into the boxes as well. Then he crouched down and sorted through the alien devices and files Ianto had collected. “Hm … I don't think that I've ever seen one of those.“

“I checked UNIT's data base and the backup they have from Torchwood One. I was able to identify some of the devices but not everything. Maybe Tosh could take a look.“

Jack nodded his agreement. “Yeah. You about done here?“

Ianto nodded. “Almost, sir.“

Jack straightened and shoved his hands back in his trouser pockets. “Bring this stuff to Tosh when you're done. I'll tell her to have a look. It's Owen's turn to help you with Myfanwy tonight.“

“I'm sure he'll be thrilled,“ Ianto said, ducking his head. The team's doctor seemed to see it as a sort of sport to find ways to remind Ianto of his betrayal.

“Well,“ Jack said and raised his eyebrows, “no matter what happened, he's still got a job to do around here. And that pteranodon is as much his watchdog as it is ours. So if he's giving you a hard time tell me right away.“

Ianto nodded. When Jack turned away to leave, Ianto called after him, “Captain.“ 

Jack stopped, tilting his head to show that he was listening.

“For all that it's worth-“

“Don't,“ Jack interrupted. He turned to face Ianto, his eyes blazing. “Don't! You told me several times already and I don't want to hear it. Not yet.“

“Alright,“ Ianto nodded slowly. 

When Jack had left, Ianto sighed deeply, brushed a hand through his short hair and whispered, “I'm sorry.“

***

The huge main Hub was echoing with the laughter of Jack's team when he climbed the stairs from the archives. Unlike most of the rest of the underground complex, it was brightly lit, the lamps attached to the brick, concrete and tile collage that were the walls. Jack liked this part of the Hub best, because it showed just how old Torchwood was. It was almost as if the different periods of time had left their marks on the complex and its architecture. 

Gwen was playing basketball with Owen and Tosh was watching them from her cluttered work station. When the Asian caught sight of Jack however, she hurriedly concentrated on one of her four computer screens again. Owen and Gwen stayed oblivious to their boss' presence.

”Alright, kids!” Jack called and joined them. Gwen smiled at him. He caught the ball when she threw it his way, but he didn't play. 

Owen grimaced. ”Back to work it is then,” he said and returned to his desk. Jack nodded and Gwen sighed deeply before sitting down in front of her computer. She was going through the police reports of the last ten years, trying to find a clue that there were crimes committed by aliens or with alien technology that Torchwood missed for some reason. Jack hadn't told her but part of the reason he let her do it was because he wanted her to improve her instincts. There could be a time when he wasn't going to be here anymore and he wanted his team to be able to tell the difference between an everyday crime and a crime that was related to aliens and thereby Torchwood. Owen was his second in command but he had a feeling that Gwen would be just as good as the doctor, maybe even better. Sometimes Owen tended to get carried away by his pride. Gwen was more sensitive and calm. 

Jack let the ball fall to the floor and it rolled into a corner. In the now quiet Hub, the sound of his steps was echoing off the walls. The only other sound in the high room was the splashing of the water that was descending the smooth outline of the water tower into the basin. The water smelled of rain, coming from the Roald Dahl Plass above the Torchwood complex where the water tower was stretching as far into the sky as it was reaching down into the ground.

Jack looked up towards the ceiling, trying to peek into Myfanwy's nest far above them but he couldn't see the pteranodon. When he turned back to head for his office, he caught Owen's dark eyes. The doctor was looking at Jack, his trainer-clad feet on his desk, keyboard on his lap and his hands laced behind his head. He seemed to be relaxed but there was an underlying tension in his eyes that led Jack to suspect that something was up. It had been brewing for days. The team was talking behind his back, whispering whenever he left the room. He hadn't called them on it since he thought that if there was a problem they should come right out and address it. 

Owen did just that now. ”Jack, what's going on?”

”Going on?” the captain asked, taking a look over Tosh's shoulder at her screen. She was still working on a translation program that would help them to read alien languages. Jack was impressed – again – by her brilliance. 

”With the tea boy.”

Ianto, of course. Jack had already guessed that it was about him. He wasn't the only one who had lost his trust in the archivist. ”Well,” he answered and turned to Owen, crossing his arms, ”he's going to finish filing for today, then he's going to come up here, clean up, do the dishes and before you're going to go home, you'll help him to care for Myfanwy.” 

”Yeah, right,” Owen frowned. ”So, that's it?”

Jack caught Gwen watching them curiously and Tosh giving Owen a warning glare. ”That's it,” he affirmed.

”Don't get me wrong, Jack. The whole cyberwoman thing took a while to get sorted out and Ianto was suspended. But now he's back, his wounds are healed and he's working. Wouldn't now be the time for UNIT to do what they do in cases like this one?”

Jack's eyes narrowed. ”Since when do you care for UNIT?”

”Since I almost got killed by a cyberwoman that was hidden in our basement by the tea boy,” Owen answered, unapologetic. ”And I'm not the only one here wondering what will happen next. Suspension seems a bit … lame for what Ianto did, don't you think?”

Jack looked at Gwen who ducked her head, hiding her eyes behind a curtain of long brown hair, and focused on the screen in front of her. Tosh met Jack's searching gaze and smiled so he assumed that she was fine with Ianto being back. He knew that both of them were getting along great. Tosh was always working late. Ianto was, too. More than once, Jack had found them in the late evening talking to each other. Then there was the matter of Tosh being a captive of UNIT once. She hated the organization since then. She was trusting Jack without any questions asked and that included his way of handling Ianto's punishment. 

”It's not my place to decide what UNIT wants to do in this matter.”

”Okay,” Owen agreed. He looked at Tosh and now, she ducked her head, clearly embarrassed. Owen looked back at Jack. ”But as coincidences go, we know that you never even reported the incident. How can they do something about it when they don't even know?”

Jack stared at Tosh. She shook her head. ”I'm sorry. He asked me to check-”

”Don't apologize, damn it!” Owen was looking at her with anger. He got up and slammed the keyboard on his desk. ”For once, this is something that _he_ has to apologize for.” 

Jack raised his eyebrows at the outburst. Owen Harper had been a challenge from day one. The young man was a brilliant doctor and passionate scientist but his attitude was a problem sometimes. He was constantly challenging Jack and he didn't know when to shut up. Jack knew that Owen didn't mean to question his authority but sometimes his temper got the better of him. 

The doctor stared at Jack with determination. ”You didn't even file a report. You were just going to sweep it under the rug. As if it never happened. I'm sure you wouldn't have done the same thing if I was the one hiding my crazy girlfriend in the basement, right? We almost died. He betrayed us. And just because you're shagging him, you won't report it?”

”Owen, my office.” Jack was already heading for it. 

Owen shook his head. ”Oh no, we're going to talk about it right now, right here.”

Jack turned around to face him, crossed his arms and stuck his chin out. Tosh ducked her head at the steely glare in his eyes.

Owen seemed to hesitate but then he said, ”He could do it again, you know. Right now, he could be down there, planning his next move. We don't even know who he is any more. He was risking this base, he was risking our lives. And all he has to do is say 'sorry' and we're going on as if nothing had happened. I won't accept that.”

”So report it,” Jack answered. ”Report Ianto. Report me. See what will happen. I know you're not fond of him at the moment ...”

Owen snorted at that understatement.

”... but believe me, you wouldn't wish on your own worst enemy what UNIT will do to him if I report what happened.” 

It wasn't the words, it was Jack's calm voice that made Owen swallow, swayed. But he stood his ground. ”There has to be more than a suspension.”

”There is,” Jack answered. ”He has to work to get back our trust. He lost his girlfriend, the woman he loved. The woman he risked everything for just to discover that she wasn't there any more to begin with. That all that was left of her was this emotionless machine. And partly, it's my fault. I should have noticed that something was off. This is my base and he managed to distract me.” Jack didn't tell how Ianto distracted him. It wasn't his team's place to know even though at least Owen was on the right track by suspecting that Jack and Ianto had slept together. 

He held Owen's dark look. ”Partly, it's the fault of all of us, because we didn't listen and we didn't care about him. He was right about that. I think you know that.”

Owen avoided his eyes. There it was. The one thing Ianto had been absolutely right about. They had taken him for granted, taken for granted that he cleaned up after them, served them coffee and did most of their paperwork … among so many other things. Nobody had bothered to ask him about his life, if he had a girlfriend or a family … or if he'd lost colleagues during the battle that turned Lisa into a cyberwoman. They went out together for drinks, never asking Ianto if he wanted to come along because he'd declined once or twice shortly after he'd started working for them. Apparently enough reason to never ask again or not to wonder why he didn't go with them. And Jack could punch himself in the face for being so stupid. A few questions about Ianto's life, a little interest in him beyond the question if he wanted to stay the night and maybe he could have avoided it. Maybe Ianto would have talked to him about Lisa. Maybe … he dropped the thought. It was too late now.

”Report it and see what will happen. Or don't and let him work to gain back our trust. Give him the chance to do it. Because I know that he won't betray us again. Why should he? He's got nothing left to fight for.” With that he turned away and went into his office. The door closed with a soft click. 

Toshiko cleared her throat. ”He's right, you know. UNIT … isn't the solution.”

”How would you know?” Owen snapped.

”I know,” she answered and her voice didn't even shake. 

Owen looked at Gwen and she shrugged, undecided. ”He's not a bad person, Owen. He just made the wrong decisions.” 

Owen dropped into his chair and glanced at Jack who was sitting behind his desk, working through some files. 

Gwen added, ”Maybe we should let him make the effort to try and gain back our trust. I think that giving second chances is important.”

”Weren't you the one who wanted to put him into a cell to begin with?” Owen asked. 

She nodded and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. ”But Jack has a point. I don't know … maybe I would have done the same for Rhys. Don't you think that you would have done everything for someone you love?”

Owen turned to his screen. 

Would he have done the same for Katie? 

Frankly, he didn't know.

***

It was almost five and Gwen had left early to meet Rhys for dinner in a restaurant. Jack was still in his office, buried in paperwork and not even looking up to check on his team. Owen had moved his chair to Tosh's desk a while ago and was going through the box with unlabelled alien devices Ianto had brought up. 

Ianto was in the boardroom one level above them, cleaning up as he always did at the end of the day. Owen could see him through the large windows, sorting through files left behind on the table after a meeting. ”It's not fair,” he said and took a milky white stone out of the box. He looked at it, then grabbed Tosh's red eraser and a small box of paper clips off her desk and began to juggle the three objects.

”Owen, let it go,” Tosh sighed, slightly annoyed. She studied the device in her hands – it looked like an extremely complicated remote control to Owen – and tried to find a match in the Torchwood One database even though Ianto had told them that he'd already tried. She wasn't really dedicated to her task, so Owen thought that she just wanted to keep busy. Maybe she was waiting for him to leave so that she could talk to Ianto without being harassed for it. 

”Jack's shagging him. I just know that he is even though they try to hide it. It's the reason Jack recruited him. Even Suzie said so.”

”When did she say that? While you were shagging her?” Tosh asked pointedly and with a hint of hurt in her voice. Startled, Owen lost the paper clip box and stared at her in surprise. He'd thought that he and Suzie had been discreet. 

Tosh just snorted. ”Please,” she rolled her eyes. ”As if I wouldn't have noticed. Jack knew, too. You're the last one who should complain about that kind of working relationship.”

”That's different. Jack's our boss. If he's shagging Ianto, he's biased.”

Tosh put the device back in the box and turned to him, her eyes serious. ”Owen, I'm going to tell you something Jack didn't.”

He looked at her curiously. ”What's that?”

”I know a bit about UNIT and their way to handle prisoners.”

”The kind of thing I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy?”

Tosh nodded. ”They would imprison him, torture him to be sure that he doesn't have another cyberman hidden somewhere and then execute him.”

Owen looked up through the windows in the conference room, watching Ianto clear the table. ”They wouldn't.”

”I looked it up. I hacked into their system and found a secret memo that was written after the battle of Canary Wharf. It was addressed to all personnel with the appropriate security clearance. Jack has that kind of clearance. He read it. That's why he didn't report the incident.”

Owen bit his lip. ”Execution. That's a bit harsh.”

”It's not the execution part you should be worried about. They know how to torture. They really do.” Tosh ducked her head, then she concentrated on the box again. She didn't want Owen to see how scared she was of UNIT. Sometimes she still had nightmares about the time she'd been imprisoned. 

Owen's forefinger rubbed over the stone's smooth surface. Torture wasn't what he'd had in mind when he thought about a punishment for Ianto. A prison cell, maybe. 

Owen looked at Ianto again then at Jack, then back down at the stone in his hands. When he was being completely honest, he didn't know what he wanted the punishment to be. But his pride was hurt and his trust in Ianto damaged and even though he'd never really let Ianto know, he'd relied on him. Ianto had become a constant in the Hub, always there and providing everything the team needed. He'd taken everything Owen had thrown his way – demeaning comments, jokes or mood swings – and he'd never done more than give a witty reply. Owen had trusted him. 

He moved his chair back to his own desk, still playing with the stone. Ianto came down the stairs from the first level. ”Owen, is it a good time now?” he asked a little hesitantly. 

Owen nodded, getting up and shoving the stone into his jeans pocket. ”Sure. Let's get it over with.” He collected his gun and put it in the back of his jeans, went to the med bay to retrieve bandages and antiseptic spray, then he joined Ianto who was carrying a bucket with meat. As if sensing that they were coming, Myfanwy let out a warning cry that echoed down towards the two young men. 

Owen swallowed. ”Tending to a bitchy hurt monster from the past. That's going to be fun.”


	2. Chapter 2

**2.**

 

In the aftermath of Lisa trying to take over Torchwood, Jack had admitted to Owen that he shouldn't have let Myfanwy try to kill the cyberwoman. Lisa had hurt the dinosaur during their fight. Most of the wounds had been superficial, but one of her wings had suffered severe damage. Several bones had been broken and the wing had been torn. Owen had stitched the wound up after Jack had put Myfanwy under with a sedative. They wouldn't have that luxury this time. 

“Good pteranodon,” Owen cooed while he was crawling into her nest. It was nothing more than a box just big enough for Myfanwy to lie in, suspended high above the ground of the Hub, just under the ceiling. Only a small ladder led up to it. Ianto was using it regularly, since he was the one who was in charge of Myfanwy's nest and meals. Owen and the others didn't come here often. 

The doctor hit his head on the low ceiling and cursed softly. He felt something wet when he supported his weight with his hand and wiped his palm on the straw that was making up Myfanwy's bed. ”Ew! This is disgusting. Why the hell can't she learn to use a litter box?” He sat down and put down the bandages and spray. Ianto crawled in next to him, the bucket with meat just out of reach. Owen wondered how he managed to look so tidy and competent in his black suit while he was sitting in the dirty nest of a dinosaur. Myfanwy was lying in the straw, her head raised and her small eyes taking in every movement the two humans made. Ianto made a soft, comforting noise and reached out a hand. Myfanwy purred and nuzzled her beak against Ianto's palm.

”Good girl,” Ianto whispered. He switched on the small light they had installed in the nest to make it easier to clean it then he looked at Owen. ”We should get started.”

”She's prone to get bitchy as soon as we touch that wound?”

”Yes,” Ianto nodded.

”Great,” Owen answered. ”I'm glad I brought my gun.”

Ianto was sceptical. ”We're here to help her,” he answered.

”Yeah,” Owen nodded, ”but if she wants to kill me, I'd rather kill her first.”

Myfanwy hissed and Owen flinched.

Ianto leaned forward and cautiously touched Myfanwy's head. ”Sh!” He looked at Owen. “We shouldn't fight in the pteranodon's nest. She can detect stress.”

”Right,” Owen answered. He noticed Myfanwy looking at Ianto in a way that could only be described as adoring. ”She likes you.” 

”Because I'm the one bringing her meals every day,” Ianto answered. He reached out and pulled the bucket closer, throwing Myfanwy a piece of meat. ”Now, if you're good, you can eat the rest later,” he promised her.

”Or us,” Owen muttered. But he reached out stroked a hand from Myfanwy's head down her back to her wing. She watched him cautiously. Owen fake-smiled at her. ”Please don't kill me.” As soon as he touched the bandage on her damaged wing, she flapped it away, nearly hitting Owen in the face, and hissed at him. He protected his eyes. 

”Right,” Ianto said soothingly. ”Sorry. Sorry. Calm down, girl.”

In the confined space of the nest, Owen felt like the perfect meal. ”Why don't we sedate her? We did when I stitched that wound.”

”This will only take five minutes.”

”Once we manage to get our hands on her,” Owen answered. Myfanwy pushed her beak against Ianto's chest with some force, pushing him away. ”Oi!” Owen said, prepared to pull his gun. 

Ianto shook his head. ”Don't. She's just showing me that she doesn't want me near her. It didn't even hurt … that much.” He rubbed his ribs and grimaced.

”Yeah, I'm going to take a look at that later,” Owen answered. 

Ianto threw Myfanwy another piece of meat and then sat next to Owen, waiting. ”Give her a minute to calm down.” He looked at her, a sorrowful expression on his face. ”I'm so sorry, sweetie.”

”Sweetie? You'd think she's a cat.”

Ianto didn't reply. He reached out a hand and Myfanwy watched him warily for a moment, before she put her beak into it. Ianto stroked the beak, then her head. ”I'm sorry.”

Myfanwy purred.

”Seriously, how much time do you spend up here?” Own asked.

”Enough,” was the cryptic answer.

”I can see that.”

”Let's try again,” Ianto said and kept stroking Myfanwy's head. 

Owen shifted position and squeezed past Ianto to sit on his other side. ”Right, you keep distracting her while I get my arm bitten of.”

Ianto smiled. ”Quit whining, Owen.”

The doctor touched the pteranodon's head and followed the long neck down to her back, over her wing. This time, when he touched the bandage, Myfanwy didn't react. She pushed her beak against Ianto's shoulder, demanding more attention, and he laughed softly and petted her with both hands. 

Cautiously, Owen peeled off the bandage, assessing the damage in the leathery wing. ”Alright. Looks good. I think this is the last time we have to re-bandage the wound. It's almost healed.”

Myfanwy's purr turned into a growl when Owen touched the new skin that was sealing most part of the once large tear in the sensitive wing. There was still part of the wound lying open and raw. 

He applied pressure on one of the thin bones. ”The fracture's healed up just fine.” He took the antiseptic and looked at Ianto. ”This could hurt a bit.”

”I know.” Ianto braced himself. This was always the most critical part in Myfanwy's treatment. Tosh, Gwen and Jack had been up here to help him with her after Owen had initially stitched her up. Ianto was the only one who'd been here during all the treatments since he knew her best, even coming in during his four-week suspension. Until now, nobody had been hurt more than a few scratches. 

Owen nodded and applied the antiseptic. Myfanwy jerked and cried out, pushing Ianto away. He fell backwards and Myfanwy was on him almost immediately, pinning him down and growling.

Owen pulled his gun. ”Fuck!” 

”Don't!” Ianto called. Myfanwy's wing hit Owen's hand and the shot went wild, hitting the ceiling of her nest. Owen was pressed against the wall by her wing, trying to protect his face while she frantically tried to escape. 

”No, no, no ...” Ianto muttered. ”No, Myfanwy. Sh.”

Owen touched the back of his head, feeling blood seeping into his short hair. ”Fuck,” he muttered, trying to get his bearings. Myfanwy flapped her wings.

”No,” Ianto said. ”Paham mae dicter, o Myfanwy, yn llenwi'th lygaid duon di?”

Owen was tempted to laugh. Sometimes Ianto managed to surprise him. The pteranodon cried out and Owen watched her eyeing Ianto mistrustfully. He stared back at her, lying on his back, held down by her claws. Owen stared at both of them, tempted to shoot again but he knew now that this would only startle her and maybe cause her to attack Ianto. He squeezed his eyes shut when pressure gathered behind his forehead, causing his eyes to tear up. He must have hit the wood pretty hard. Myfanwy growled menacingly, then she suddenly turned her head away and moved off Ianto, curling up in a corner.

Ianto squeezed his eyes hut, relief written all over his face. ”Oh God!” 

”That was close, huh?” Owen asked, relieved when his headache dulled. He felt a smile tug at his lips, feeling lighter now that the danger was over.

”For a moment there ...” Ianto sighed.

”You recite Welsh songs to her?”

”It works,” Ianto answered. 

Owen pulled him closer by his arm. ”You okay?” 

Myfanwy was cowering in the corner, eyeing them. 

”Yeah, I think so. And you?”

”Hit my head,” Owen answered. He looked at Myfanwy. ”Let's just leave it that way, Ianto. She doesn't really need the bandage anymore.”

The archivist nodded his consent and shoved the bucket towards Myfanwy, before emptying it. They crawled out of the nest and stood up on the small platform next to it before closing the hatch. Owen breathed a sigh of relief and staggered against the wall. Ianto grimaced in pain and reached a hand up to his shoulder, under his jacket. It came back smeared with blood. He looked at his hand as if he wasn't able to grasp what he was seeing. The doctor in Owen kicked in and he tilted Ianto's head up to look into his eyes. 

He seemed to be lucid, no shock. Ianto just stared at him. ”She nicked me with the beak.”

Owen peeled the suit jacket way, finding the white shirt and the grey waistcoat red around Ianto's shoulder. ”Nicked?” he asked. ”Are you kidding me? That's a lot of blood.”

”Owen,” Ianto said and squinted, swaying.

Owen felt Ianto lean against him. ”Hey, you're not going to pass out on me, are you?” he asked and pushed Ianto against the wall. Then he closed his eyes for a moment, feeling sick himself. 

Ianto muttered, ”You have blood on your neck.”

Owen nodded. ”Yeah, I hit my head a bit harder than I let on.” He got dizzy. ”Oi … a lot harder.”

”You're not passing out on me, are you?” he heard Ianto ask before Owen did just that.

***

Owen came to when he was laid down on a cold surface. He opened his eyes and immediately recognized his white-tiled realm – the med bay. He was lying on the autopsy table in the centre of the circular room. 

Jack was towering over him, arms crossed over his shirt. Concern was written all over his handsome face. "You back with us?" he asked and Owen nodded cautiously, staring at the bare walls and trying not to throw up. Jack must have carried him all the way down from the nest. Owen felt rubbish enough not to care just how embarrassing that was. 

Jack turned away from him. "Ianto, do me a favour and sit down before you fall down. I think I've carried enough men for one day."

Owen turned his head and saw Ianto slowly sitting down on the steps leading down to the med bay, pressing a towel to his injured shoulder. He'd lost his jacket and waistcoat, was pale and a little shaky. Someone stepped into Owen's line of sight and it took a moment for the doctor to realize that he was openly staring at Tosh's breasts now. He sat up slowly, then he raised his head. 

She was already snapping on latex gloves she'd taken out of one of the metal supply closets that lined the wall. "You have a head wound. Maybe a concussion."

"Thank you very much, Doctor Sato," he answered sarcastically. 

She rolled her eyes. "Otherwise, you seem to be just fine. You were lucky."

Owen held onto Tosh's shoulder when the room began to sway dangerously. 

Jack was crouching in front of Ianto now, looking at the wound. "You both were." He shook his head. "A nick, Ianto? I'll have to stitch you up."

Owen hopped off the table. "Let me do that." He got dizzy, stumbled and then Tosh was the only thing preventing him from falling down.

"Just stay put until I have a look at your head," she said, exasperated.

"Doctors are the worst patients," Jack smiled. He gestured for Ianto to press the towel back onto the wound and straightened. Owen pointed to one of the metal cabinets but Jack didn't seem to need his assistance. Owen frowned. Sometimes he forgot that Jack had been working for Torchwood quite some time now, long enough to be in the photographs of the last ten years. 

He didn't want to feel so useless. “It's the second ampoule from the right. You'll need-“

“I know. It's not the first time I've stitched someone up.“ Jack prepared a local anaesthetic.

“How come you never help me if you're such a good doctor yourself?“ Owen asked a bit irritated. 

Jack smiled. “The only things I'm good at are stitching and amputation.“

“You know, that's not exactly calming me down.“ Owen reached for the syringe in Jack's hand but the captain turned away.

Owen glared at him. He let Tosh help him back onto the table and pouted while she tended to his wound. He couldn't help but watch Jack taking care of Ianto ... and giving advice. "I don't like his pallor," he said. "Jack, maybe he's going into shock."

"I'm not going into shock," Ianto answered. "I'm just fine." He sighed in relief when the local anaesthetic took hold and muted the pain to a dull ache. Jack started to stitch. 

Owen leaned to the side to watch him work. "Okay, doesn't look too bad. Ow, Tosh!" 

"Sorry," she said, not sounding as if she really was. "Done," she said a few minutes later.

Owen couldn't help fingering the bandage on the back of his head. "Not bad," he admitted. "Painkillers?" He held out a hand and Tosh went to get some ibuprofen. 

Ianto focused his eyes on Jack. "You don't have to do this," he said softly.

Jack looked up at him. "I want to," he answered. 

"It won't be necessary to heal that wound, you know. Once UNIT shows up."

Jack avoided Ianto's eyes and didn't answer. He concentrated on bandaging the wound under Owen's watchful gaze. And if he let his fingers linger a little longer then necessary on the soft skin of Ianto's chest, the younger man didn't comment on it. When Jack was done he straightened up and turned to Owen and Tosh who had taken a seat on the table beside the doctor. "Go home." He looked at Ianto. "All of you. Let's call it a night."

***

Jack kept staring at his computer screen as if that would erase the UNIT memo glaring back at him. "Damn it," he muttered and shut off the screen. He leaned back in his chair and closed his eyes, feeling drained and old all of a sudden. There was a report lying in his desk drawer, handwritten and waiting to be typewritten. It contained interviews with his team concerning the cyberwoman incident, his own report and a request to leave disciplinary measures to him. A request that would have the same chance a snowball had in hell. Which was why he hadn't reported the incident yet. As much as what had happened had hurt him he couldn't hand Ianto over to UNIT. Despite what Owen and the others were thinking, it had nothing to do with the fact that Ianto and Jack had had sex. He would do the same for them. The betrayal just hurt much more. He'd believed that Ianto had come to his bed willingly just to find out that it had been a necessary evil to distract him from the cyberwoman Ianto had hidden. 

He wondered just how many times Ianto had wished to be somewhere else while they'd been sleeping together. Jack felt like a rapist even though he knew that he hadn't done anything wrong. The worst thing was that he'd thought that Ianto had enjoyed it as much as he had. That he'd liked spending time with him. Not only in the bedroom, but outside as well. The sex had only been a minor factor in their dynamic. They hadn't been in a relationship, but they'd shared a mutual respect and a friendship Jack had come to rely on. Late-night talks in the Hub while brooding over paperwork, early-morning chats before the others arrived, the lessons in shooting Jack had given Ianto ... everything – the flirting, the smiles, the casual touches – had been a lie. And he'd fallen for it. 

Jack opened his eyes again and sighed deeply. There was the soft sound of steps and Jack turned to his door. "I thought I told you to go home," he said. 

Ianto shrugged. He winced a moment later when the movement pulled at his shoulder. He was wearing a fresh red shirt and the spare jacket he kept in his locker. "Don't know why I should. There's so much to do around here. The archives and ..." He held up the file in his hand. "... this." 

"The budget," Jack sighed and rolled his eyes. "I almost forgot about it."

"I took the liberty of doing it. All you have to do is sign it, sir." He stepped into the office and stopped in front of Jack's large desk, just between the two wooden chairs placed in front of it for visitors. He handed Jack the file. 

The captain opened it, signing the first sheet of paper. "Thank you, Ianto."

"Don't you want to read it?"

"I trust that you did it right. You promised me not to betray Torchwood again. I believe you."

"And yet ..." Ianto began, not finishing the sentence.

"And yet ..." Jack echoed. He looked at his assistant. "I think that whatever was or wasn't between us, it will take a little longer to heal."

Ianto closed his eyes and ducked his head. He looked dejected and Jack felt a pang of sympathy but he didn't show it. This wasn't his fault. He wasn't the bad guy for once. Ianto was. 

The archivist's eyes found the small hatch in the floor of Jack's office, near his desk. He wondered just how often he'd opened it to join Jack in his bedroom underneath. He blamed himself for how things were between them now. 

He nodded slowly, turned away and headed for the door. Jack decided that he should let him know – the others did. It was only a matter of time before they told Ianto.

"I didn't file a report with UNIT."

Ianto stopped and whirled around to him. "Sir?" 

"I didn't report the incident with Lisa. And I never will."

Ianto seemed to be shocked, not relieved. "Why?" 

Jack shrugged. "I don't approve of their disciplinary guidelines. She's gone and there are no other cybermen out there. The threat's nonexistent." Ianto was still staring at him in bewilderment and Jack added, "I want to give you a chance. And I want you to take it. So, instead of worrying when UNIT will be by to take you away, you should focus on your work here, Ianto." 

The young man nodded hastily. "I will."

Jack saw tears gathering in his bright eyes and pressed his back against his chair so that he wouldn't get up and do something he would regret. He wouldn't give in. He wasn't the bad guy. "Go, Ianto," he said.

"Thank you, sir," Ianto answered and fled the office, wiping his eyes. 

Jack watched him leave and then buried his face in his hands. He let out a frustrated growl and yanked open the drawer in his desk, taking out the report. He shredded it and then sat back down in his chair. "Ianto Jones," he muttered, "I really hope this is worth it."


	3. Chapter 3

**3.**

 

“Listen, I’m not interested,” the pretty brunette said. 

She left Owen standing at the bar. 

”Thank you,” he called after her. For a second he thought that she was looking back at him hesitantly but then she joined her three friends – all of them just as gorgeous as herself – and they started to talk. Over the noise of the club, Owen couldn't hear what they were saying. But the brunette looked at Owen and said something that made her friends laugh and stare at Owen, too. He turned away. ”Just great. The perfect end to a perfect day.” Tentatively, he fingered the wound on the back of his head. He’d gotten rid of the bandage after taking a shower at home. The wound was superficial, hidden by his short hair. The concussion Tosh had diagnosed was just a headache. Owen should know. He was the team's doctor after all. 

He signalled the bartender and shoved his hand in his jeans pocket to look for the money. His fingers touched something cool and smooth and he closed his eyes in defeat when he remembered what it was. ”Great. Jack’s gonna kill me.” 

To take alien technology with them when leaving the Hub had always been forbidden but it was a really big no-no ever since Suzie had gone crazy and killed herself. After the incident with Myfanwy, Owen had forgotten about the stone he’d found in the box with unlabelled alien technology. 

He decided to put it back tomorrow without anyone noticing. It was for the best after all. They didn’t even know what it did. 

He sighed in annoyance. His day was just getting better and better. The brunette had been the fifth girl tonight to reject him and he really needed a shag. He rubbed his forehead against the increasing headache. The bartender handed him his beer and Owen found the money in his other pocket.

”Let me buy that drink for you.” The voice was female but deep. Owen turned his head and raised his eyebrows in surprise when the brunette that had rejected him rather loudly just a minute ago was now standing next to him, handing the bartender money. She leaned one arm and her hip against the bar. She was wearing a black dress that accentuated her curves perfectly. ”Hello there.” Her blue eyes sparkled. 

Owen laughed. ”What? Change of mind?”

”Yes.” She rolled her eyes. ”My friends over there … they thought I was being too hard on you. I mean … you are kinda cute.” She put a hand on his arm. ”And you look beat. Bad day?”

”The worst,” he answered. ”Was yelled at by my boss and I hit my head pretty hard when wrestling with … the watchdog.” 

She nodded in understanding. ”Poor thing,” she said. Then she grinned. ”I'm Melissa and I know how to make you feel better.” Her eyebrows raised suggestively. 

Owen smiled, his mood lightening up. ”I bet you do.”

***

Owen woke up warm and comfortable in his own bed. The first sunrays were caressing the room, falling through the large windows Owen's bed was standing against. Melissa was lying curled up around him, her long brown hair tickling his chin, naked chest and arms. Owen considered calling in sick and convincing her to do the same. They could just stay at home to spend the day in bed. It had been a long time since he’d had the opportunity to indulge. Working for Torchwood was great but it took much from him, from his life. Immediately after Katie's death, he hadn't cared about that but he was slowly coming to realize now that, maybe, he was missing his second chance. 

His stomach growled at him and Owen checked his watch. He wasn’t running late, yet, but he should get going if he wanted to have the time for a proper breakfast. Somehow he craved one of those. He sighed deeply, caressing the smooth skin of Melissa’s back. She smiled up at him, all sleepy blue eyes and tousled hair. 

”I have to go to work in an hour,” Owen said. 

Melissa’s full lips settled into a pout. ”A shame,” she said. 

”Believe me, I know.” He kissed her passionately, then he growled in frustration and got up. ”Listen, coffee’s in the kitchen. Help yourself. There should be bread and stuff in the fridge. I’m gonna take a shower.” With that, he left her in his bed and went to get ready. He shaved and checked his wound. 

When he returned to his bedroom to get properly dressed, he heard Melissa in the kitchen. He cursed when he realized that he would have to do the laundry again soon, and put on the same jeans he’d worn the evening before. He managed to find a clean sweater in his closet and went to join Melissa in the kitchen, rubbing his forehead against an increasing headache. When he entered the kitchen, he stopped abruptly. 

Melissa smiled at him, a cup of coffee in her hand. ”I made breakfast.”

”I can see that.” His eyes took in the small table, completely set, the two plates with scrambled eggs, toast and bacon and the bread, cheese and honey – he didn’t even know that he had honey. The table seemed like an island in his spartan flat. He could get used to this. A smile touched his lips and he sighed happily. Melissa ushered him to a chair and sat him down, before taking her place opposite him.

”Wow!” he said. ”Thanks. I’m really hungry.”

Melissa poured herself a cup of coffee. ”I thought so. I could hear you stomach growl.” She smiled. ”I wanted to do you a favour.”

”Well, you did,” Owen smiled and dug in. 

***

Most of the time, Owen loved his work. But there were moments when he really didn't. "What? Again?" he asked. 

Ianto nodded, holding out the forms on a clipboard, ever the dutiful servant. "A full inventory is necessary every month, Owen. You should know that by now."

Owen snorted and leaned back in his chair. "I haven't got time for this."

Tosh rolled her eyes. "You know, it wouldn't hurt to keep track of the things you need. That way, you don't have to do everything at the end of the month. I'm always writing down the things I use immediately so that I know what I need to have replaced." 

Owen glared at her. "Because you are a freak!"

She seemed hurt and turned back to her screens. Owen looked back at Ianto. His eyes caught Gwen sitting on the couch a few feet away, reading a magazine. "Why doesn't she have to do hers?"

Ianto blinked slowly – whenever he looked like that at Owen, the doctor felt incredibly stupid. "She doesn't need to since she's not researching and thus not ordering supplies."

"That's unfair."

Jack interrupted the argument from the door to his office. "That's life. I have to do it too, Owen, so just take the forms and stop making a fuss over it every single month."

"Yeah, well, it's not as if there is much you have to request. Paper clips, maybe. You're always done after only five minutes." Owen took the clipboard from Ianto with more force than necessary. "Great. I'm off to count band-aids." With that, he sulked towards the med bay. Jack glanced at Tosh with an amused grin and she smiled back. Gwen looked after Owen and pulled a compassionate face. 

Jack nodded at Ianto. "Let him pout for a while, Ianto."

The archivist gave a small smile. "Don't I always, sir?" He headed for the stairs to the archives.

***

Owen massaged his temples, accepted the mug of coffee Ianto was handing him and watched the young man taking the stairs up to the main Hub. He was passed by Gwen. She joined Owen who had pulled up a high chair to the autopsy table and was going through his stash of needles. Gwen leaned her elbows on the table and looked up to the entrance of the med bay before she said softly, "I could do that for you. That way you can get back to your project and autopsy the hell out of that space rat." 

He frowned. They had found the animal during a Weevil hunt a week ago. It was bigger than a rat from Earth but it looked just like one, hence the name. The week had been busy and Owen hadn't found the time yet to do the autopsy. He really wanted to. Nevertheless ... 

"Why would you do that?"

"To do you a favour. I mean, how long is this going to take?" She looked at the half finished inventory form and shrugged. "An hour at the most. Ianto just served you your coffee so he won't be coming in here for at least two hours. No one will know. I'll do the inventory and you do ... your thing."

"This will take longer than an hour."

"If you do it," Gwen smiled. "Remember, I was working for the police. Inventories, forms ... we love those. I'm faster than you."

Owen looked into her green eyes, but she didn't seem to make a joke at his expense and he really had a headache and didn't want to do his inventory. She nudged his shoulder conspiratorially. "I won't tell Jack."

He smiled his thanks. "You better not."

***

After Lisa, Owen had taken it upon himself to do a regular check-up on Ianto just to be sure that everything was alright. He knew that Ianto was bad at taking care of himself when he was stressed. Ianto had been sick shortly after starting to work for Torchwood Three. A cold that had developed into a pneumonia. Owen had assumed that Ianto had been still traumatised by the battle of Canary Wharf, thus neglecting his health. And maybe that had been the case, but now he was pretty sure that a lot of it had to do with hiding Lisa, too. The result was the same - when stressed, Ianto didn't take time to eat properly or to rest. Owen didn't want for that to happen again. He was a doctor after all. 

"Okay," Owen said and wrapped a new bandage around Ianto's shoulder, "looks fine to me." He stepped back from the autopsy table and picked up Ianto's medical file. 

"As I said, I'm good," Ianto answered and shrugged into his shirt when Owen signalled him that he was done with the bandage. He kept sitting on the metal table while buttoning up. 

Owen looked at Ianto's file and shrugged. "I'm not so sure. You are too skinny, your BP's elevated and I can see that you're exhausted. How's it going with the nausea?" 

"Better," Ianto said and Owen rolled his eyes. ”Really,” Ianto promised. During his suspension, he'd begun to get nauseous, an additional strain on his body when he'd already been exhausted. He hadn't thrown up since he'd returned to work. That didn't mean that the bouts of nausea had vanished. They were still there and he could hardly eat. Another reason for him to avoid sitting down for lunch with the team. 

Owen frowned. "Right. Okay, that makes the fourth week I'm asking you this question and you didn't gain any weight since your suspension. Instead, you lost three pounds. And you're skinny enough to begin with." 

"I'm just not very hungry. A little stressed." 

"You know, I'll have to keep checking up on you twice a week until you gain some weight and I can see that you're getting better and I know that we're both pretty fed up with these meetings. I think you should talk to someone." 

"I don't have PTSD." 

"No, but stress can be just as bad." 

"I'm fine." 

"Whatever you say, tea boy. You can go now." 

Ianto grabbed his jacket and tie off the table and hurried up the stairs towards the main Hub. 

"And get some rest." 

"I'm fine," Ianto answered and was gone. 

"Yeah, right." 

It had been a week since Ianto's suspension. A little over three weeks since Tosh had gone to check up on him during his forced vacation and found him in his bathroom throwing up. She'd called Owen when Ianto did it again the next day and the day after that. Owen could see why. Ianto had been in a stressful situation and his body was still reacting to it since he refused to talk about it with anyone, preferring to torture himself with the memories and _what if_ s. Add the workload that Ianto was expecting himself to handle and the way Owen and Gwen were still treating him like a stranger sometimes, which only caused Ianto to try and please them the more, and Owen could see why he was exhausted, stressed and emotionally drained. Ianto was working especially hard to gain back Jack's trust and the captain made sure that Ianto knew that his efforts were appreciated. He put his foot down when Owen's comments got too hurtful or Gwen's questions too curious. He obviously wanted to keep Ianto as his assistant. Owen could relate. Ianto was damn good at his job. 

But other than that, Jack kept away from Ianto and their relationship was professional – no flirting, no touching and maybe that was worse for Ianto than losing Jack's trust to begin with. If they'd been shagging before the cyberwoman incident, then Owen could see why the captain was keeping his distance now. He was a proud guy and it must be hard on him that Ianto had managed to get under his skin. 

Owen climbed the stairs to the main Hub and joined Tosh who was sitting on the old, lumpy couch, taking a break by eating cold pizza and reading an article she'd printed out. Gwen was sitting at her computer, obviously working but looking bored. Owen watched Ianto, now properly dressed again with his jacket and tie, heading for Jack's office and looked away when the captain and the archivist started to talk about something Ianto had jotted down on a piece of paper. 

"Is everything okay with him?" Tosh asked. 

Owen looked at her. "He should get some rest." 

"You are worried," Tosh remarked. 

Owen brushed a hand through his dark hair. "It's not as if I want to be, you know. As far as I'm concerned, he still betrayed us." He sighed. "But Jack wants to keep him so we'll have to live with him." He snatched some cheese off Tosh's pizza. "And to be honest, UNIT is a bit extreme." 

She nodded. "He did it out of love. He didn't want us to get hurt." 

Owen made a non-commital noise, still thinking about strategies to force Ianto to get some rest. He frowned when his headache returned with a vengeance and closed his eyes against the Hub's lights which were too bright all of a sudden. Maybe he should tip off Jack. The young man always seemed to listen to the captain. 

There was an alarmed "Ianto?" coming from Jack's office and then he called, "Owen!" 

The doctor jumped up from his place on the couch and ran towards Jack's office. He heard Tosh and Gwen's steps behind him, but he didn't pay them any attention when he reached the office and found Ianto sitting on the floor, his back against Jack's desk, and the captain crouching next to him. Jack had pushed a chair aside to make room for Ianto and he was looking worried. When Owen entered, Jack's eyes found his. "He just collapsed," Jack said. 

Ianto opened his eyes. "I'm fine." 

Owen kneeled next to him. "Really?" He shone his penlight into Ianto's eyes. 

"Just got dizzy," Ianto answered. 

"Yeah, right. You're white as a sheet. I told you to get some rest," Owen answered, taking Ianto's pulse and noticing the trembling hands and the light sheen of sweat on Ianto's face. "BP's elevated." He sighed. "Still dizzy?" 

"No," Ianto answered. 

"What were you doing?" 

"Going over the inventory of the Hub with Jack." 

"Everything seemed to be normal," the captain nodded. 

"Everything was. I felt fine." 

"When was the last time you ate?" Owen asked. Ianto thought about it. Owen sighed. "Okay, that's taking too long." He got up and held out a hand. With Jack taking Ianto's other hand, they got him to his feet. The archivist straightened his jacket and tie. Tosh and Gwen were standing near the door and he gifted them with a reassuring smile. It didn't work on Owen. "When was the last time that happened?" he wanted to know. 

Ianto frowned in concentration. "I'm not sure. I'm not really prone to those things. Even when I haven't been eating." 

"Well, your body is already weakened," Owen said. "That sounds like a valid reason, doesn't it?" 

Jack walked around his massive desk, back to his chair. "Take a break." 

Ianto turned to look at him. "But, sir-"

"Take a break, Ianto," Jack repeated with determination. "Eat something." 

Ianto sighed in defeat.

***

Owen was tired. And it wasn't even time to go home for several hours. He'd completed the autopsy, had handed in his inventory – neatly filled out by Gwen who'd even managed to fake his handwriting –, done the check-up on Ianto and watched the archivist choke down a sandwich. All before he'd helped Jack catch a Weevil. 

Now, back in the Hub, the captain had gone to take a shower and Owen was sitting on the couch, waiting for coffee to magically appear on the table in front of him. But of course Ianto was in the archives and couldn't know that Owen was craving a cup of coffee. Though he wouldn't put it past him. The archivist seemed to have some kind of sixth sense in that regard sometimes. 

He sighed deeply and closed his eyes. Maybe he should go home early, finally take care of that persistent headache. The smell of coffee caused him to open his eyes in surprise. Gwen was holding out a mug. "For you." 

Owen stared at her. "For me?" 

She nodded. 

"How did you get the machine to work?" 

The coffee machine was Ianto's baby. Owen had used it only once. He'd forgotten to clean up afterwards and Ianto had taken revenge by teaching him for half an hour how to do it. Owen refused to use it ever since. 

"It's easy," she said. Owen frowned suspiciously and Gwen rolled her eyes. "Okay, I took it from the thermos in Jack's office." 

"Have you gone bonkers? He'll kill you if he finds out." 

Jack was possessive when it came to Ianto's coffee. 

Gwen grinned. "He won't." 

Owen took the mug. "Thanks." 

"Just doing you a favour," Gwen said and left for her desk. 

Tosh looked at Owen with raised eyebrows and grinned. "Are you two ...?" 

He shook his head. "No!" He averted his eyes. He had the indistinct feeling that Tosh could see him thinking about the kiss he and Gwen had shared while hiding from Lisa. Even though they'd never told anyone about it. "She's just doing me a favour." 

"Huh," Tosh said. Owen had to give it to her, it was puzzling. Gwen wasn't the kind of girl who just served you a coffee. 

Owen saw Jack heading for his office and decided to hide in the med bay. He left Tosh at her desk, pondering Owen's all too rushed answer to her question. Were they shagging? Tosh couldn't imagine that. Gwen had a boyfriend after all. But she didn't know Gwen that well yet. Maybe … it had been meant as a joke. Now she wasn't so sure if she could still laugh about it.


	4. Chapter 4

**4.**

 

Owen stretched out on couch in the main Hub and looked at his watch. Time to go home – finally. Gwen asking Tosh if she wanted to have a girls' night out reminded Owen of the kiss he'd shared with the newest Torchwood member. Since the kiss, there was this unresolved sexual tension between him and Gwen, Owen was sure of it. Gwen was all smiles when talking about her boyfriend but, sometimes, it seemed a bit forced. 

Gwen giggled at something Tosh had said and grabbed her handbag from under her desk. She hadn't been with Torchwood for long yet. Until now, she'd been little Ms. Perfect, Jack's new protegée, but they all had something to hide, it was almost some kind of job requirement. Owen hid his past, not wanting anyone to know that he’d once had a fiancée. Too many questions would be heading his way. Why was he being such an asshole then, if he’d been well on his way to get married once? And what had happened to her? Only Jack knew and the captain wasn’t the kind of guy to gossip about stuff like that. Tosh … Owen couldn’t figure out what she was hiding, but there was something lurking in the dark. Jack knew about it, of that Owen was sure. And he … Jack hid so many things that it was impossible to count them. He was a puzzle that no one could solve. Owen wasn’t sure if maybe Jack was unable to solve it as well. And Ianto had hidden his cybergirlfriend, his secret was out, but maybe he had a new one already. Maybe he and Jack were shagging again after all. 

Owen wasn’t homophobic. Far from it, actually. When the opportunity arose he was able to swing both ways though he preferred women. He just thought that it was wrong for Jack to get wrapped up with Ianto. It was bad for the team’s dynamic and it was so pathetic on Ianto’s part, confirming what Owen had thought of him from the very first day: stalking Jack for a job, pathetic; not going out in the field, pathetic; cleaning up after them and doing everything he could to make their day less stressful, pathetic, but useful. 

Gwen and Tosh called out their goodbye’s and were gone. Owen sighed deeply. Ianto shouldn’t get involved with Jack. He wasn’t a bad-looking bloke, he could find a new girlfriend in no time if he would only drop his sad face for once and smile. Maybe a girlfriend was exactly what he needed. Someone to come home to, to take his mind of things. He should take Ianto to a pub, Owen decided. Help him find a girl. Or a boy, Owen wasn’t picky. Jack would be happy, too, since Owen was spending time with Ianto and making an effort. 

”Ianto!” Owen called. He didn’t know whether the tea boy was in the main Hub but he was far too comfortable on the couch to move. 

”Six cups are enough don’t you think?!” Ianto’s voice floated to him from above. From the hothouse. 

”I’m not asking for coffee! You want to go out with me?!” 

Jack walked past him. ”You’re not his type.” He slapped Owen with a folder playfully. 

”Don’t you worry, Harkness, I don’t wanna get into his pants. He's all yours.” 

Jack ignored the hint like he always did. That's why Tosh didn't believe Owen's theory that Jack and Ianto were going at it after office hours. They were as discreet as hell. 

”I can’t!” Ianto’s voice echoed down the stairs. ”I have things to do!” 

Owen growled in frustration. ”Like what?!” 

”Watering the plants, feeding the Weevils, looking after Myfanwy …” 

”Oh, c’mon, tea boy!” 

Ianto's steps echoed on the metal, nearing the stairs. ”I really don’t want to! I’m not in the mood!” Owen rolled his eyes and rubbed his aching forehead. Ianto took the stairs. ”Another time?!” 

”As if,” Owen muttered. ”C’mon, Ianto!” 

Jack walked back to his office, minus the folder. ”Don’t beg. He doesn’t like that.” 

”You would know,” Owen shot back. Damn it, how could he get Ianto to come with him? 

There was the noise of something tumbling down the metal stairs and Jack and Owen looked at each other in alarm, before rushing towards the source of the sound. Jack running ahead. ”Ianto?” 

They found him lying on his stomach at the foot of the stairs, unconscious. Jack kneeled next to him and put a hand on his back, trying to get a good look at his face. ”My God,” he breathed. 

Owen checked Ianto’s pulse. ”Stable.” He performed a short check, looking for broken bones. ”Nothing. He didn’t fall that far.” 

”Has that got something to do with his exhaustion?” 

Owen nodded. ”Maybe,” he had a closer look at Ianto’s head, ”but he didn’t hit his head. Not as far as I can tell. I don’t know why he’s unconscious.” 

Ianto carefully opened his eyes. ”’m not,” he mumbled. ”Ouch!” 

”Don’t move,” Owen said. ”What hurts?” 

”My head. Headache.” 

Jack helped Ianto to sit up and then left to get a glass of water. Owen looked at Ianto's pupils. ”Dizzy again?” 

”Dizzy. And headache. And then suddenly … I don’t know.” Ianto frowned. 

Owen asked, ”What?” 

”Something’s not quite right,” Ianto answered. ”Something strange is going on.” He rubbed his forehead. 

Owen rolled his eyes. ”Okay, I think you might have hit your head after all. What’s the last you remember?” 

Ianto shrugged and took the glass that Jack was handing him with a grateful smile. He sipped and answered, ”You asking me to go to the pub with you. Then … I'm not sure. It almost felt like ...”

Owen frowned. ”What?” 

Ianto shook his head. Owen looked at Jack. 

Jack raised an eyebrow. ”Yeah, you’re not going home tonight.” 

Ianto looked up at him, puzzled. 

”You’re staying here where I can keep an eye on you. You’re going to sleep. Eight hours at the least.” 

Owen nodded his consent. ”I’ll see if I can find you something to help you sleep.” He headed for the med bay. 

Jack leaned closer to Ianto and said softly, ”As soon as he’s gone, we’re having a talk.” 

Ianto swallowed, unsure as to what Jack would want to talk about, but he nodded. ”Yes, sir.”

***

Owen supposed that he could take a shower and go out. But he was tired and not really in the mood for clubbing, so he fell into his armchair and turned on the television. Rain was battering his large windows, making the thought of going out even more unappealing. When he shifted his position to get more comfortable, something dug into his thigh. He shoved a hand into his jeans pocket and got out the stone. ”Damn!” He'd forgotten to put it back. Well, Tosh didn't seem to have missed it. Owen muted the tv and got more comfortable, looking at the stone curiously. What was it for? 

He frowned. It looked like something IKEA would sell in the decoration department but it had to be alien. Maybe he could ask Tosh to take a look at it tomorrow. 

No, he wouldn't. Owen closed his hand around the smooth, cool surface. He would just check it out himself when the others were gone, he just had to get Jack out of the Hub, too. Then he would be free to do whatever he wanted. He smiled, that sounded like a plan. He put the stone on the small table next to the chair and got up to take a shower. 

While he was standing under the hot water, his thoughts returned to the stone. 

Why was he being so secretive, anyway? 

He could just tell Jack that he wanted to take a look at it. The captain would let him. Jack liked his team to work independently. He wanted them to enjoy their projects. Tomorrow, he would go to Jack and tell him about the stone (well, not about the fact that he'd taken it home with him - that would be suicide) and that he wanted to examine it closer. 

When Owen sat down on his chair half an hour later with a plate of microwaved take-out and a beer, his eyes caught the stone lying innocently on the table. Owen shook his head. No, he couldn't tell the others. He didn't know why but a little voice told him that he should keep the device - whatever it was – a secret for now.


	5. Chapter 5

**5.**

 

Ianto hadn't seen off-duty-Jack for a while but when the archivist returned to the main Hub after closing the tourist office, Jack was standing in his office, going through some files. His braces were hanging down and his light blue shirt was a crumbled mess on his office chair. The white t-shirt he wore underneath was untucked. Ianto couldn't help himself. He went to the captain's chair and took the shirt, folding it neatly before putting it on the edge of the desk to take with him later and add to the laundry. Jack watched him with his dark eyebrows raised. ”You are nervous,” he finally said. 

Ianto nodded. ”Yes, sir.” 

”Why?” 

Ianto swallowed, folded his hands behind his back and answered, ”I don't know, sir.” 

Jack shoved his hands into his trouser pockets and nodded towards his own chair. ”Sit down, Ianto.” 

The young man rounded the desk and slowly sat in Jack's chair. He folded his hands in his lap and fixed his eyes on a point on the brick wall just above Jack's shoulder. He believed that he knew what was happening here. It had been a wonder that Jack hadn't given him Retcon after Lisa's death. Maybe he'd realized now that he couldn't keep Ianto here after all. 

The captain sighed, rubbed his forehead and then stepped in-between the desk and the chair. He turned the chair and Ianto to face him and perched on the edge of the desk. His chest was blocking Ianto's line of vision and since Ianto didn't want to sit there, staring at the captain's body, he ducked his head. He noticed that Jack was sitting on some papers for UNIT and pulled them out from under Jack to put them aside. Some of them were dog-eared now and Ianto tried to smooth them out. 

”This isn't going to work,” Jack said and Ianto felt his stomach drop. 

His hands stilled. Jack gently took hold of Ianto's chin and forced him to look him in the eyes. Ianto took a breath and answered, ”Please don't, captain.” 

”I don't know what else to do.” 

”I'm sorry.” 

”This isn't the kind of thing you can just be sorry for. You're hurting the team. You're hurting me. And it has to stop, Ianto.” 

The younger man ducked his head and Jack let him go. Ianto pulled his hands back to rest them on his thighs. He forced back tears, then he met Jack's gaze. ”I need Torchwood. Please, captain. Don't send me away.” 

Jack frowned. ”No one's sending you away.” Ianto's confusion must have shown on his face, because Jack leaned forward and shook his head. ”Don't you realize what's going on? You're abusing yourself. I can't have that. You collapsed twice. If that's not a warning sign I don't know what is.” He straightened up and crossed his arms. ”To make myself clear: I want you to stay, Ianto. You're great at what you do and despite recent events you aren't giving up. I think that all of us can be really good together, as a team, but it'll take some time. So I don't want you to force it. Not when your health pays the price.” 

Ianto ducked his head again, looking at his hands. ”I'm trying.” 

”I know that. But, you see … you were at Canary Wharf. You've seen what those … things can do.” 

Ianto had seen it – the fall of Torchwood One. He remembered fire and screams and blood. Cybermen in every room, taking Torchwood personnel with them, killing them or worse: converting them. Like Lisa. 

Jack continued, “And you hid one of them. It nearly got loose, it almost managed to take over. It was very close to killing us. What you did was incredibly stupid, it was a betrayal of our trust and worst of all, it got two people killed. Tanazaki knew the risk, that's true, but that poor girl?” 

”I know, sir,” Ianto answered. ”I'm sorry.” 

”But,” Jack continued and Ianto looked up at him, ”after everything settled down and during your suspension, I realized that it played you. And it played you well. It used Lisa's memories to make you believe that she was still there. I realize how much you loved her and I realize that you thought she was the only one you had left after Canary Wharf. I understand loneliness and that you did everything you could to avoid it. You didn't want things to turn out the way they did. That's why I didn't report it to UNIT.” Ianto stared at his hands again. Jack sighed. ”That's why I trust you to do your job and the others will, too. Tosh has already forgiven you, right? Gwen's half-way there and Owen's making an effort.” 

Ianto nodded. They sat in silence for a minute, Jack waiting for Ianto to say something and Ianto unsure as to how to voice his question – wondering if he should voice it all. 

He cleared his throat. ”What about you?” 

Jack could have acted ignorant and asked Ianto what he was talking about but he didn't. It wouldn't help matters, maybe only make things worse than they already were. 

He took a moment to think about his answer, before he said, ”It's different, Ianto.” 

”Yes,” Ianto answered. 

”You used me.” 

Ianto nodded. 

”And I feel like I forced you to do something that you didn't want to do. Like I forced you into my bed.” 

Ianto raised his head, an incredulous expression on his face. ”No. Don't think that, captain.”

Jack sighed. ”I'm trying, okay?”

Ianto nodded. ”I just wish you would accept my apology, sir.”

”I can't. Not yet.” He was still feeling betrayed and used and confused … sometimes he wanted to embrace Ianto and help him overcome what had happened, sometimes the anger bubbled to the surface.

Ianto nodded. ”I see.” He hated this abyss between them but Jack didn't need to know that. He was going out of his way already by making sure that the team accepted Ianto back and by not sending him away. He was taking care of him. Ianto looked at Jack and smiled helplessly. ”But just to be clear, sir, you didn't force me. I came on to you.” 

Which wasn't really true, Jack had been the one initiating the flirting. But Ianto had been the one who had kissed him the first time. 

”So … why?” Jack asked. ”You could have easily distracted me without sex.” 

”I needed your trust,” Ianto answered, choking on the words, ”so I gave you what you wanted.” He couldn't tell Jack that it became so much more to him. The captain could take it as emotional blackmail. Besides, he didn't even know if Jack would still be interested in him. Sure, he'd told Ianto that he felt hurt and used, but that could just be his pride talking and not his feelings. 

What had happened between them had never been more than sex. They didn't date or built a relationship. Most of the time, sex had been the ending of an exhausting day of work. Jack had flirted with him over the last stack of paperwork, grinning and offering whatever Ianto wanted and Ianto had accepted. He was ashamed to confess even to himself that he'd done so gladly the last few times. A few hours in Jack's bed had been a few hours without worrying about Lisa or being found out. A few hours for him to ask for anything he wanted and getting it. It always ended the same – no promises or strings attached. They left Jack's bedroom and were boss and secretary and he could never be sure when it would happen the next time.

Jack closed his eyes. ”As simple as that?” 

Ianto nodded. ”As simple as that, sir.”

***

Jack knew it was foolish. And he'd promised himself not to let it happen again because as an immortal, as someone who had travelled through time and space, he lost too many people in his life, but he'd become attached. Attached to a little planet called Earth, to Torchwood Three, attached to the team and to Ianto Jones. 

He was sitting with his his arms crossed in a corner of his small bedroom under his office, his knees bent. It was almost dark down here, only a little light penetrated through the open hatch, coming from the main Hub, filtered by the blinds drawn down over the windows of his office. The bed was narrow, nothing more than a cot, really. The only other furniture was a small bedside table and a wooden chest of drawers Jack had bought in the 70s. 

Ianto was sleeping peacefully, dressed in a t-shirt and sweatpants, huddled into a ball under Jack's blanket in Jack's bed and it was kind of ironic. They'd slept together in this bed many times, always after sex, when Ianto had been too tired to go home or Jack had been too comfortable to let him go. 

Ianto sleeping there, alone and under the influence of sleeping pills, seemed wrong. They had eaten after their conversation, making painful small talk, then Ianto had taken the pills and fallen asleep a short time later. 

Jack got up and stepped to the bed. He reached out a hand brushed it through Ianto's dark hair tenderly, allowing himself to touch the younger man now that he was asleep. Jack's eyes traced Ianto's face, the dark circles under his eyes and the pale skin and even though he would never admit it and never do it – he wanted to crawl into the bed and cuddle up to him. Not for sex. Just to rest. Before Lisa happened, he'd enjoyed Ianto's company, his knowledge about old movies Jack had last seen when they'd been shown for the very first time, his quick wit and quiet intelligence. Jack wasn't in love. Far from it. He'd been in love too many times to count and he knew exactly what it felt like, but this thing with Ianto, it hadn't been just about sex in the end, either. 

Not for him.


	6. Chapter 6

**6.**

 

Owen knew that Jack was pissed off when he entered the Hub the next morning and found the captain with his arms crossed in his office, staring darkly through the windows to his working team. Tosh and Gwen were at their desks, typing and sipping coffee. Ianto was nowhere to be seen. 

Owen dropped his tired body into his chair. ”What's going on with Gloomy?” he asked Tosh. 

She threw him glance. ”He-” 

”Owen!” Jack bellowed and the doctor flinched. 

”... is angry at you,” Tosh finished. 

Owen swallowed and nodded. ”Thanks, genius.” 

He entered Jack's office and closed the door, feeling like he'd been called to the principal's office. By now, Jack was sitting in his chair, his hands folded on the table. It was his boss pose. It always seemed a bit ridiculous because Jack was as far from a conventional boss as he could be. 

”Morning, sunshine,” Owen said. 

Jack held up a folder. ”What's this?” 

Owen swallowed. He didn't have to look at the forms to know that he was in trouble. ”My inventory.” 

”Gwen did this for you. Why?” 

Owen rolled his eyes. ”I was busy.” 

”We all are,” Jack snapped, then he sighed and shook his head. ”Alright. Sorry.” He cleared his throat. ”Listen, Owen, I just … I just want to make this work, okay? First Suzie goes crazy and then there were several security breaches with you lot taking alien devices home ...” 

Owen winced. 

”... and then Lisa happened and I think … we need to change a few things. _I_ need to change a few things. Part of that is to work as a team which means no exploiting your colleagues, Owen.” 

”She offered,” Owen answered. Jack looked doubtful. Owen promised, ”She did. How did you find out?” 

”Gwen and Tosh were talking about it. They didn't see me coming.” 

Owen nodded. ”It won't happen again,” he said. 

Jack smiled. ”Glad to hear it. Feel free to scamper off.” 

Owen made for the door, but he stopped before reaching it. ”Did Ianto get some rest?” 

Jack nodded. ”He slept soundly for about eight and a half hours. I made him eat a healthy breakfast.” 

”Cold pizza?” 

Jack nodded. ”What else?”

***

It was a buzz in the back of his mind, something he hadn't been able to quite shake since mid-morning, and it irritated him. 

Owen tried to focus on the files on his screen, looking for any suspicious deaths around Cardiff like he did every day, but there were none. Tosh squealed when Jack lifted her off her feet and put her down after turning in a half circle. Then he attacked Gwen, taking the ball from her after tickling her. He made for the basketball net attached above the cog wheel door. Ianto stopped at Owen's desk and collected three empty mugs, before reaching for a plate with an old sandwich on it. 

”I was going to eat that,” Owen pointed out. 

Ianto raised his eyebrows. ”You've been saying that for three days now. It's going to grow feet.” He reached for the plate. 

Owen slapped his hand. ”Don't touch that!” He took the sandwich and bit into it. It tasted like shit but he refused to back down, glaring at Ianto. The archivist muttered something in Welsh and moved way. Gwen laughed loudly and Owen frowned, feeling a headache build and the buzz intensify. They were being too loud. He couldn't concentrate. A man had died from a heart attack. He'd been just a few years older than Owen, that was kinda unsettling. He opened the next file. Tosh yelled at Gwen to toss her the ball. Cold sweat was gathering on Owen's forehead. He rubbed it away. Whatever Jack was doing to take the ball away from Gwen, it made her squeal. Myfanwy cried out, seemingly enjoying the fun the humans had. Ianto grabbed the plate with the sandwich faster than Owen could stop him. 

”Gwen!” Tosh yelled and it was the last straw. Owen got up from his chair with enough force to knock it over, causing Ianto to jump out of his way with a startled yelp. A mug slipped off his tray and shattered on the concrete floor. 

Owen didn't care. ”Oi! Do you lot mind? I'm working here!” 

The sudden silence was all-encompassing. A frown appeared on Jack's forehead and the arm he'd wrapped around Tosh's waist to hold her back squeezed gently, reassuringly, before letting her go. Ianto crouched down to gather up the broken mug. Owen rubbed his forehead, feeling a little dizzy and wobbly. 

”Sorry,” Gwen said. ”But it's late. Our shift was over half an hour ago.” 

Owen wanted them to just go away and leave him alone. He didn't know why but he'd been a bundle of nerves ever since lunch. God, he had a headache the size of Wales! 

Tosh put away the ball. ”Maybe we should go for a drink.” 

Gwen nodded. ”Sounds great.” 

Owen nodded gratefully, feeling already better. ”Yes, thank you.” 

”You not coming with us, Owen?” Gwen asked. The doctor shook his head. He turned away to pick up his chair, finding it already back where it belonged. The broken mug was gone, as was Ianto. Owen sighed and sat down, calling up a new file to continue working. 

Jack retrieved his coat from his office, finding his archivist already there. Ianto helped Jack into the coat and smoothed it down over the captain's shoulders. Jack turned around to face him. ”Fancy a drink?” 

”No, sir.” 

”C'mon, Ianto,” Jack said. ”We talked about this. No risking your health by over-doing it. Get a few drinks with us. Spend some time with the team.” 

Ianto sighed deeply and nodded. ”Alright.” 

Jack grinned. ”Great.” When he passed by Owen with Ianto, he asked, ”You joining us later, Owen?” 

The doctor shrugged. ”I don't know yet. Maybe.” 

Jack accepted that and when Ianto, Gwen and Tosh had gathered their jackets, they left the Hub. Silence entered in their place and Owen breathed a sigh of relief, then he pulled the stone from his pocket. ”Let's get to work.”

***

It was cold and already dark outside. The light shed by the lamps positioned around the bay was reflected by the puddles that had gathered on the wooden catwalk. 

Tosh watched Ianto lock up the door, her thoughts still on Owen. ”What’s with him?” she asked no one in particular and Jack shrugged. 

Gwen huddled into her coat, trying to escape the cold. ”I guess it’s PMS.” 

Jack laughed and started walking towards the Plass, his team mates in his wake. Tosh shivered and pressed closer to Ianto, grasping his arm and seeking warmth. He looked down at her and she smiled. ”It’s cold,” she explained. He smiled back faintly and put his arm around her shoulders to tuck her closer to his body. His coat smelled like the air freshener he’d set up in the tourist office. There was also the faint smell of his aftershave and coffee that always surrounded him. Tosh liked how he smelled, she found it oddly comforting. She wrapped an arm around his waist. ”I thought about writing a new search engine for the archives,” she said. ”I thought that you could help me out. No one knows the archives better than you.” 

Gwen was laughing about something Jack had said and pushed him away playfully. 

”Sure,” Ianto answered. He pulled Tosh closer, for just a second, and bent his head to speak softly to her. ”Thank you.” 

Tosh knew that he wasn’t talking about the search engine.

***

“Radiation,” Owen stated into the silence. The Hub was quiet and Owen imagined that it was this way whenever Jack was alone at night. Just the sounds of water dripping down the water tower, Myfanwy softly cooing and Tosh’s computers beeping. No voices, no laughter and no steps. Just Jack and this old building that was a mash-up between past and future, just like Jack himself. 

Owen wondered how Jack could stand it. 

”But don’t you worry,” he continued, talking to himself. ”It’s not dangerous.” He’d experimented with the stone, scanned it, prodded it and now it was lying on his desk innocently, next to Owen’s keyboard. ”What are you?” Owen whispered. The data base didn’t help. No similar technology had been found by UNIT, Torchwood One, Two or Three. The data base of Torchwood Four had been lost along with the base … somewhere. Sometimes Owen wasn’t sure if Jack was pulling their legs by telling them that there had been a Torchwood Four. Who lost a _building_ anyways? 

The ringing of his cell phone startled Owen out of his thoughts. He looked at the Caller ID and rolled his eyes. ”Still working, Tosh.” 

There was noise in the background, people talking, music playing and Jack laughing. 

_”Sorry, just wanted to ask you if you really don’t wanna join us. Gwen’s going to sing karaoke.”_

Even though the thought of Gwen totally humiliating herself was tempting, Owen wanted to find out more about the stone. 

”No.” He knew that he was sounding slightly irritated but he didn’t care at the moment. 

_”Okay, sorry.”_ Tosh sounded crushed. 

Owen said, ”Hey, thanks for making the decision to go out for a drink.” 

_”Not a problem. I was just doing you a favour,”_ Tosh answered and hung up. 

Owen dropped his cell on his desk and leaned back in his chair. It was about half a minute later that it hit him. He straightened up and grabbed the stone. ”I’ll be damned.” 

But it was perfectly reasonable: Gwen doing his inventory, Melissa changing her mind and Tosh keeping the others off his back. Whenever he’d wanted something, the others gave it to him. 

No, impossible! Why should an alien paperweight be able to do something like that? Except … everything was going just as he wanted ever since he'd found the stone. Even Myfanwy had stopped her attack all of a sudden and curled up in a corner of her nest. Owen had seen crazier things while working for Torchwood.

Tosh was always nice to him but Gwen wasn’t. Not nice enough to do his inventory. Melissa had rejected him before coming back to take him up on his offer. Not everyone seemed to be affected though. Jack was being his usual self or he wouldn't have ripped him a new one this morning but Jack was special. Ianto … Owen didn’t know if it was working with him. Maybe he should test it. Maybe he should test them all. Until now, the stone had picked up on his subconscious wishes. Maybe it would work even better when he put his mind to it. 

Mind control. 

”How cool!” 

Time to test his boundaries.


	7. Chapter 7

**7.**

 

Its eyes were dark and unreadable in a face that was somewhere between an ape and a monster and Owen shivered involuntarily. He remembered the first time that he’d seen one of them. Jack had taken him down here, to the cells, and sat him down on a chair. 

_”Look at it,”_ he’d said. _”It wasn’t born on this planet. It came through the Rift. And it’s real.”_

Owen had been overwhelmed then, new to Torchwood and insecure. 

The Weevils still scared him on some level even though he’d learned how to fight them. 

”Hello, Stuart,” he said, clutching the stone in his hand. The Weevil was standing in a corner of the bare cell, the glass separating it from Owen was stained. The smell of moist walls was clinging to Owen's clothes already. The cells weren't a pleasant place but a necessary evil. They couldn't control the Weevils, only catch them and take them back where they had come from – from under the city. This one – named Stuart even though they didn't even know if it was a boy – was kept in the Hub because Jack wanted to find out more about them. 

It bared its teeth. 

”Do me a favour,” Owen said and touched the glass with one hand. ”Sit down.” 

It growled. The stone wasn’t working on Jack. Maybe it wouldn’t work on Weevils, either. 

”Sit down,” Owen repeated and he concentrated on Stuart's eyes. He felt a headache build behind his forehead and suddenly, there was something he couldn't see but feel. It was like a solid wall. 

Owen frowned. He tried to push against it, mentally, and gasped when the headache lessened and Stuart backed off to sit back on its haunches. He stared at it. He hadn't experienced this before – the need to push against a mental wall. Maybe that had something to do with using the stone intentionally. Maybe he hadn't realized it before because he thought it was just a headache. Fact was, he could control Weevils. That would make hunting them easier. And not as dangerous as it was now. 

He cleared his throat. ”I’m coming in.” He opened the cell with the remote control and swallowed. Stuart was watching him curiously. Owen entered the cell cautiously. ”Good boy,” he whispered. It made its move when he was standing just a few steps away from it. It leapt to its feet. Owen’s mind screamed _Back off!_ while his body was reaching for the gun he’d tucked into his jeans. He didn’t need it. His mind’s order slammed into Stuart like a bullet, forcing it back and to the ground. Owen left the cell hurriedly and closed the door. He stared at Stuart who was sitting whimpering on the floor of its cell. 

”Wow!” Owen gasped. Laughter bubbled up from somewhere deep within. His hands were shaking, still working through the second of panic he’d experienced when Stuart had tried to attack him. Above it all was a feeling of accomplishment that made him dizzy and a pride and happiness he couldn’t quite explain. This was the best thing that had ever happened to him, he decided while looking at the stone. He ignored the small voice in his head telling him that he should call Jack.. Jack would take away the stone, Owen was sure of it. No, this was a good thing. As long as he kept it a secret, this was a good thing. 

***

The next day, Owen decided to get a bit of revenge for all the times Gwen and Tosh had ganged up on him. He found it just as easy to get into Gwen and Tosh's minds as it had been to get into Stuart's. He ignored the headache, and soon, his body seemed to adjust to his new gift. The headaches lessened and by late afternoon, they were gone. Only a slight pressure behind his forehead remained whenever he accessed Tosh's and Gwen's minds. He made Gwen bring him coffee and Tosh clean up his desk. Both of them were smiling while doing so which led Jack to make a dirty joke about threesomes and why the hell hadn't he been invited? 

Whenever Owen used the stone he felt a warm happiness sweep through him that made him slightly giddy, a feeling he hadn't had in years – ever since Katie – and that urged him to use the stone more often than he'd wanted to in the beginning. Owen didn’t try to influence Jack. Better safe than sorry. He didn’t think about influencing Ianto until just before their shift was over. 

The archivist had spent the majority of the day in the tourist office, going through files in the backroom and talking for about an hour to a group of tourists who insisted on speaking in Welsh without ever having tried to use the language before. It took them ten minutes just to ask for the toilet. The rest of the time went by with them perusing the shelves of catalogues and refusing to take the hint that Ianto wanted to lock up for the day. 

When Ianto came back into the main Hub, Jack called him to his office immediately. Owen watched them going through some paperwork. 

”It’s not nice to spy on people,” Tosh said. 

Owen rolled his eyes. ”I’m just looking.” Gwen returned from the fridge and handed him a can of Coke. He smiled. ”Thank you.”

”No problem,” she answered. ”Anything else I can do for you?” 

”Not at the moment.” 

She joined Tosh at her desk. Owen took a minute to revel in the warm feeling the use of the stone gave him and then opened the can. Gwen was easier to influence than Tosh. He was getting better at mentally reaching out to the girls but he paid attention not to overdo it. He couldn’t let Jack get suspicious. 

”What are you waiting for?” Tosh asked when he kept staring to Jacks office. ”It’s not as if they’re doing something interesting.” 

That was when the idea struck Owen. ”You willing to bet on that?” 

The stone was heavy in his jeans pocket. He’d learned that he didn’t need to touch it to use it. He didn’t reach out and influence Tosh over a bet, though. He wasn’t going to go that far. Besides, it wasn’t necessary, she would bet against him, he was sure of it. 

Gwen frowned. ”What do you mean?” 

”I bet that Ianto will kiss Jack before leaving that office.” 

Gwen and Tosh laughed. Tosh pulled a five pound note from her jeans pocket. Gwen dug her wallet from her bag. ”I’m in. No way is that happening.” 

Owen knew that they were right. It would never happen. Not when he didn’t interfere. Playing with Tosh and Gwen was getting too easy, he wanted to give Ianto a shot. He put a fiver on his desk to show the girls that the bet was on, then all three of them got back to work, secretly watching Jack’s office. 

Ianto was standing next to the captain’s chair, leaning on the desk with one hand and, with his other hand, pointed something out in a file Jack was holding. 

Owen focused on Ianto, mentally reaching out to him. 

Ianto frowned and swayed. He put both his hands on Jack's desk to ground himself.

”Hey!” the captain said. ”Ianto, are you alright?”

Ianto closed his eyes, the lights were suddenly too bright. ”I ...” 

Jack got up from his chair. ”Sit down. Come on.” He gently grabbed Ianto's shoulders. 

It wasn't easy. Owen felt as if he was running against the wall he had – until now – overcome so easily. He frowned and closed his eyes, trying harder this time. 

“Sit down,” Jack muttered again, guiding Ianto to his chair. 

Ianto gasped when he felt something – a presence, someone, another mind – pushing against the barriers he'd built around his mind. ”Sir,” he said and grabbed Jack's wrist, ”Code Seven.”

Then everything went white, red-hot pain burning through his skull and Ianto whimpered. He couldn't breathe, there wasn't enough air around him. He tried to gather his reserves just as he'd been taught, and was dimly aware of Jack calling for him and then screaming for Owen. Ianto pushed back against the intruder's mind, trying to gain his footing. But his last training had been so long ago and he wasn't even sure if his barriers were strong enough to keep the intruder out. He strengthened his barriers, gasping for air, and remembered what he had been taught to do: _Identify the intruder_. 

He held on to the intruder's mind, reached _into_ his mind lying surprisingly open and unprotected and that didn't make sense … shouldn't he try to protect himself while attacking Ianto? 

Jack's voice was reaching him from far away, muttering, ”Breathe, Ianto. You have to breathe.”

He held on with all his might until the pain got unbearable, then he pushed him away and everything went black. 

Owen gasped and looked around. He was sitting in the Hub at his desk and the last thing he remembered was trying to get into Ianto's mind. What had happened? 

Gwen grabbed his shoulder. ”Owen! Did you fall asleep? Jack's calling for you.” 

”What?” Confused, Owen looked at her. 

Jack left his office. He was carrying Ianto, wrapped in the captain's coat. ”Owen!” he bellowed. ”We have a PS. I need you now.” He laid Ianto on the couch and tucked the coat around him. Owen reacted on auto-pilot. He ran for the med bay and got his kit, then headed back into the main Hub to sit on the couch next to Ianto's outstretched body. The younger man's eyes were partially open, unfocussed and unaware. He was breathing heavily and was wheezing a bit as if he didn't get enough air. His face was pale and sweaty. Owen grabbed his penlight and tested the pupils. Then he listened to Ianto's heartbeat, frantically trying to remember what he'd learned about PS during the last UNIT conference. Jack was crouching next to him, his hand in Ianto's hair. ”Owen?” 

”Hey! I'm doing what I can, okay?”

Gwen crossed her arms while Tosh was standing next to her, biting her fingernails nervously. Gwen's voice was shaking, ”What is PS?” 

No one answered her. She wanted to know what was going on. Everyone seemed tense and she thought that she could see Owen's hands shaking and that scared her. Gwen decided that Owen didn’t need any distractions and addressed the captain, ”Jack? What is PS?” 

He looked at her, a frown etched into his forehead. ”Gwen, check the CCTV. Look for someone lingering on the Plass or near the tourist office within the last hour. Tosh, check our alarm systems and make sure that we have not been breached.” 

Tosh nodded and headed for her desk, obviously relieved to have something to do besides staring at Ianto's slack face. 

Gwen was stunned. ”What?” 

”Just do it!” Jack snapped. Gwen pressed her lips together, but she obeyed. Jack addressed the doctor, ”Owen?” 

”Hey, it’s the first time that I’ve confronted this kind of thing.” He put an oxygen mask over Ianto's face. 

”Just give him the Tiramin. You have to work faster. Or else he will-” 

”I know, Jack! Okay? I know. But I can't just give him the damn shot! I have to make sure that it won't kill him.” He loaded a syringe. ”And it won't. Okay, let’s see if this works.” 

Gwen and Tosh watched from their computers as Owen injected Ianto. Gwen bit her lip and then focused on the screen again. Owen took one Ianto’s wrists and with his other hand adjusted the mask. ”He’s having trouble breathing. Pulse is too slow. C’mon now.” 

What had he done? Owen closed his eyes for a second. What the fuck had he done? 

He should have known. 

Ianto gasped for air loudly and blinked furiously. Jack was immediately on the couch behind him, propping him up against his chest. ”Ianto?” 

The young man panted, still staring at nothing. Then his hands flailed and held onto the first thing they could find, namely Owen’s sweater. He was still shaking like a leaf, but finally, he blinked one last time and awareness returned to his eyes. ”Oh God!” His voice was muffled by the mask. He pulled Owen closer. ”Oh God!” He sounded terrified and Owen couldn’t blame him. Only himself. 

Jack pried Ianto’s hand lose from Owen's sweater and offered his own hand as a replacement. Jack was staring darkly at Owen and for a second the doctor thought that he’d been found out. But then the captain shook his head. ”It never was exhaustion. Someone’s been trying to get into his head.” 

”No one on the CCTV,” Gwen said. Ianto’s trembling subsided and he was getting drowsy. Gwen's voice was like steel now, ”What’s going on?” 

Jack seemed to know that he couldn’t shut her up this time. ”PS is a psi shock. It happens when someone tries to get into the heads of people who received psi training that helps to block any intruders. That was mandatory for Torchwood One so Ianto had it. That way, they could be sure that no outer influence was trying to gain access to Torchwood by using one of their own.” 

Owen cursed himself. He should have known. Torchwood One. Psi training. It wasn't news to him. Why had he even tried? 

Gwen was staring at Jack as if he’d grown a second head. ”So … if someone tries to use mind control?” 

”Or something similar,” Jack answered. He got up, carefully settling the now sleeping Ianto on the couch. Owen focused on monitoring Ianto's breathing. Jack shoved his hands into his trouser pockets. ”Blocking such an influence doesn’t necessarily mean that someone goes into psi shock. Depending on how well they are trained, people can fend off the influence or at least send out an alarm before being taken over. I know that Ianto was deemed talented. He can fend off powerful influences. Him going into psi shock … I think that whoever did this was not only very strong but very violent, too. You can influence someone subtly and gracefully – in some galaxies it’s regarded as an art – or you can trash their mind with a sledgehammer. The latter is the case here. Ungraceful but it almost worked.” 

Gwen frowned. ”So Ianto fended him off?” 

Jack nodded. ”He wouldn’t have gone into shock if he hadn’t. PS is the body's reaction to … a battle of minds for lack of a better explanation. Fighting off an intruder is exhausting and painful and 21st century bodies are not build for that kind of struggle.” 

Gwen looked at Ianto, sleeping but still breathing erratically. ”He will be okay, though?” 

Owen nodded. ”I gave him an adrenaline mix Torchwood invented for emergencies like this one to pull him out of it and he will be okay when he wakes up.” He went back to monitoring Ianto's breathing. 

Jack brushed a hand through his short hair. ”There was no one near Torchwood.” He was looking at Gwen. 

She shook her head. ”No.” 

Tosh added, “And the alarms work just fine. No intruder.” 

Jack sighed. ”Whoever it was, he was strong. It’s hard to build a connection over a distance.” 

”Why Ianto?” Gwen asked. 

”Why not?” Jack answered. ”He has all the keys, almost all the codes and he knows the base better than even me. His mind’s like an all you can eat buffet for intruders.” 

”Why not you?” Gwen wanted to know. 

Jack smiled. ”I’m too strong. I was trained to withstand that kind of influence even before I joined Torchwood which means whoever did this knows us. Maybe even our files.” 

”What are we going to do now?” Tosh wanted to know. 

Jack sighed. ”We can’t do a thing. We can’t detect the use of mental powers. It could have been anyone.” 

Owen bit his lip and ducked his head.

***

“Do you think someone's trying to get to us?” Gwen asked when she left the Hub with Tosh.

”Seems that way,” Tosh answered and locked the tourist office from the outside. 

The wind clawed at their coats and Gwen looked up into the grey sky. ”Looks like rain.”

”Same old,” Tosh muttered. They started toward the Roald Dahl Plass. Tosh smiled up at her. ”Sometimes I wonder why we can't find some weather device, you know. It would never rain again.”

Gwen laughed. ”That would be nice.” They walked in companionable silence for a minute then Gwen asked, ”What was Jack going on about when he talked about 21st century bodies?”

”There are many things from the future coming through the Rift,” Tosh answered. ”Jack knows a lot about them and about the future in general. Don't ask me how. That's Jack for you.”

Gwen shrugged. She wondered if she should tell Tosh that she'd seen Jack die just to get up a minute later as if nothing ever happened. She decided against it, it was his decision if he wanted to share his immortality. ”You think Ianto will be okay?”

Tosh shoved her hands into her coat pockets and stared at the pavement, watching her feet evade the puddles left over from yesterday's rain. ”Jack says so.”

”How would he know?”

”No idea,” Tosh admitted and muttered, ”Why do you care anyway?”

Gwen stopped. ”You're being unfair.”

Tosh turned around to her, a frown on her face. ”Am I?”

”I care about Ianto.”

”Do you?”

Gwen shook her head and turned away, heading for her car. ”I really don't have to listen to this.”

Tosh caught up with her and grabbed her arm. ”You wanted him to be put in a cell. You wanted Jack to give him Retcon.” 

Gwen stopped. ”I was shocked, okay? Those were the worst two hours in my whole life.”

”I'll give you that,” Tosh said. ”Really, I understand. What I don't get, is you and Owen, the last few weeks and right now. He's doing everything he can to put Ianto down and you ignore him.”

”That's not true.”

”Right … sometimes you ask him about Lisa and about Canary Wharf and why he hid her instead of telling Jack the truth. You have no idea, Gwen, absolutely no idea how much it hurts him to talk about it or to be asked questions about it. That's why Jack interrupts you every time you do it. You just don't get the hint. You waltz right on.”

Gwen ducked her head.

”Ianto was sick during his suspension. Sick and alone and tired. He didn't even call me and when I came by and found out, I had to drag Owen to Ianto's flat and he came only because he's Ianto's doctor. You never even showed your face. Even Jack came by.” Tosh sighed. ”The way I see it, Ianto made a huge mistake. Didn't you say yourself that he isn't a bad person but just made wrong decisions? You're all talk, Gwen. Remind me again how many men died when you let loose that sex-deprived alien.” With that, Tosh turned away and left. 

Gwen stared after her.

***

Owen sipped his coffee and stared at his screen. Gwen and Tosh were already gone and he was sitting alone in the main Hub. The door to Jack's office opened. He walked over and stood, looking over Owen's shoulder. ”What are you doing?” he asked. 

Owen sighed. ”Finishing the report on the Weevil hunt yesterday.” 

”That's not what I mean.” 

Owen frowned and looked at Jack who was staring down at him with a dark expression. 

”It's only a matter of time, you know,” he said. 

”What?” Owen asked. 

”Until I know who did this.” 

Ianto spoke from the direction of Tosh's desk. ”Owen?” 

He looked at the younger man's confused expression. Ianto asked, ”Who are you?”

… Owen startled awake. His bedroom was almost dark, only the lights from the city cast a weak glow, letting him see the shadows and outlines of his closet and the door. Rain was tapping against his windows behind him. 

”Damn,” Owen whispered. ”Damn!” He had to get rid of the stone. He had to. 

But while he was drifting off again, a little voice told him that, if he really wanted to, he would have told Jack about it this afternoon.


	8. Chapter 8

**8.**

 

Jack watched Ianto wrapping his hands around the cup of hot tea and winced in sympathy when a loud shriek from Myfanwy flying her rounds in the empty Hub made him flinch. 

”Aspirin?” he asked. 

”Won't help.” 

”I know,” Jack answered, hugging the clipboard in his hands to his chest. ”Just wanted to feel useful.” 

Ianto gave him a tight smile. ”You are.” He pulled his legs up on the couch to his chest. The sweatpants and oversized t-shirt he kept in the Hub along with a spare suit for emergencies made him look small. He was shivering again. It had gone away after the hot shower but by the time Jack and he had eaten a late dinner the shivers were back. 

”Still cold?” Jack asked. 

Ianto nodded. ”It's been a while since I had a PS. Never had a full-blown one.” 

Jack nodded his understanding. He'd never had a psi shock but he'd witnessed two before. The most important thing was quick help, warmth and patience. The victims sometimes couldn't walk for a few days or lost their ability to speak for a few hours. The brain was vulnerable and every psi shock had different outcomes. Ianto's speech was slightly slurred and his reactions were slow, his hands shaking. The grip around the cup eased the trembling but Jack could still see it. ”It's okay,” he said, not really knowing why. ”You can sleep here in a few minutes, but we have to get this over with while the memory's still fresh.” He held up the clipboard as if to prove his words. 

Ianto sipped his tea. ”No problem.” 

”I think you know the drill,” Jack said. 

Ianto nodded. ”I managed to hold on to his mind for a few seconds. I got a glimpse. It was a man,” he said softly. “Young.” He closed his eyes to concentrate. 

Jack jotted it down. ”Alright. What else?” 

Ianto sipped his tea. ”He didn't shield himself. He had no barriers at all which is odd because … well ...” 

He shrugged and Jack nodded. He knew what Ianto wanted to say. First lesson was always to shield one's own mind. Controlling others was something for more advanced classes. 

Ianto sighed. ”I could feel his emotions. There was … fear, pain ...” He frowned and looked at Jack. ”Confusion?” 

”Confusion?” Jack echoed. ”Are you sure?” 

Ianto nodded. ”Confusion. It was actually the dominant emotion.” 

Ianto was thinking and Jack watched Myfanwy fly, letting him have the time. 

Finally, Ianto shook his head. ”That's all I've got. It happened so fast and it's been a while since I had training.” 

Jack nodded. ”That's okay. Bedtime for archivists.” 

Ianto smiled tiredly and put the cup away, before stretching out on the threadbare couch. 

”Take my bed, Ianto,” Jack suggested. 

Ianto shook his head. ”I really couldn't. This is okay.” 

Jack sighed and left to get a blanket. He spread it over Ianto. 

”Thank you,” the younger man whispered. 

Jack's hand found its way into Ianto's hair and the archivist opened tired eyes to look at him curiously. Jack let his hand linger in the dark strands. ”You scared me today.” 

Ianto didn't answer. He couldn't apologize because it hadn't been his fault and it was stupid to apologize for something he couldn't have changed. He settled on working one hand out of his nest and sliding his fingers into Jack's. ”I was scared myself.” 

Jack brought their joined hands to Ianto's face and brushed his stubbled cheek with his knuckles. He crouched down beside the couch. ”Don't do it again, Ianto,” he whispered. 

It was as if the Hub didn't exist around them. The bright lights, Myfanwy, Tosh's computers softly beeping … nothing was there. Just them. 

Ianto swallowed and pulled Jack closer. ”I'll do my best.” 

Jack kissed his forehead and Ianto closed his eyes when Jack nuzzled his cheek and then kissed his lips tenderly. Ianto shivered again, this time for a whole different reason, and untucked the blanket from around his body. He held it up, inviting Jack in. Jack's hand accepted the invitation, settling on Ianto's slim hip and pulling him closer. But then he froze and Ianto could see the shutters fall behind Jack's eyes. 

The captain sighed, short and irritated, before taking his hand back and tucking the blanket around Ianto's body once more. Another kiss to Ianto's forehead, brisk and sloppy, and then he straightened. ”I'll turn off the lights, okay?” 

Ianto nodded slowly. ”Okay, sir.” Jack was half-way to his office, before Ianto asked, ”May I say it?” 

Jack shoved his hands into his pockets and turned around. ”Not yet, Ianto.” 

The archivist nodded in disappointment. Jack gave him a small smile, almost apologizing, and left. When most of the lights flickered out a moment later, Ianto sighed. ”I'm sorry.” 

He didn't see Jack dropping into his chair with a tired sigh, rubbing his face and brushing an angry hand through his hair.

***

Gwen Cooper loved her work at Torchwood. It was challenging and new and dangerous but it was also fascinating and fantastic and it was a shame that Rhys would never know. 

Rhys stopped the car to let a group of children cross the street. ”So, I tried to explain the whole thing to him but he just goes, like 'Man, that's complicated.' And I say, 'It's not, you see?'” He accelerated. ”'It's easy. Leia and Luke are siblings. And the new movies, well, they happened before the old ones.' And he look at me as if I'm stupid or something.” He laughed and Gwen smiled. She hadn't really listened. Ever since she'd come home the day before, she'd been pre-occupied by thoughts about mind control, cybermen and Tosh's words the evening before. To think that, a month ago, her biggest concern had been a pub brawl … it was mad. 

She sighed. ”Stop here.” 

He parked the car and looked out towards the Roald Dahl Plass. ”There's nothing here.” 

”Oh, I'll walk the last bit of the way,” Gwen answered. She leaned over to brush a kiss on his lips. Before he could ask more questions, she got out and slammed the door shut. She waved at him and hurried towards the Plass and the tourist office beyond. Rain was starting to fall and she picked up her pace. When she ran towards the door, she kept her head down. That's why she didn't see Owen step away from where he'd been watching the raging sea and ran into him. 

They both cursed and Owen spat, ”Damn it, Gwen, look where you're going!” 

”Sorry,” she said. 

”Yeah, right,” he answered and entered the office. 

Gwen followed him inside. 

Ianto came from the backroom. Gwen wondered when he came in to start work. Or when he went home; he was just always there. 

He gave a friendly smile. ”Good morning.”

”You wish, tea boy,” Owen answered and leaned over the counter to open the door to the Hub. 

Gwen didn't follow him, instead lingering at the counter. ”He's a bear this morning. Don't let him get you down, Ianto,” she said. 

”I won't,” Ianto answered. 

He straightened out some pamphlets and catalogues. The door to the Hub closed with a grinding noise. 

”Do you feel better?” Gwen asked in concern. 

”Much, thank you.” He smiled. It seemed a bit false like all his smiles since Lisa died. ”I'll go downstairs with you. I think Owen will already be yelling for his coffee.” He opened the door to the Hub again and stepped around the counter. 

Gwen surprised him with an embrace. ”Ianto, I'm so sorry.” 

She could tell that she'd startled him and that he was a bit uncomfortable. He was tense and he returned the embrace just barely. ”For what?” 

”You know,” she said. She looked up into his eyes. ”For being so mean the last few weeks. Not dropping by during your suspension and … ignoring you.” 

Again a false smile. ”Well, you had a reason to be angry.” 

”You had a reason to stand by Lisa.” She sighed. ”When it comes down to it, you lost someone that night. And I'm incredibly sorry for that.” She laughed. ”I mean, I'm the one who let loose a sex-deprived alien.” 

”I doubt that the two situations can be compared,” Ianto answered, but he was smiling and this time, it was a little less false. 

”People died,” she said. 

The silence was broken by the door to the Hub closing. Ianto cleared his throat. ”I'm sorry, too.” 

”You said that already,” she reminded him. ”More than once.” 

”Still,” he answered. 

The door flew open and Tosh entered with a gust of wind and a few raindrops. ”Stupid weather!” she said, slamming the door. ”Ianto,” she smiled warmly. ”Coffee?” 

”I'll make you some right away.” 

”You're an angel.” 

”In disguise,” he answered. 

Tosh laughed.

***

It was an annoying buzz just this side of painful. Owen had had many headaches in his life – hang-overs, migraines, headaches resulting from a cold or a fever. But this one was different. Not so much aching as annoying. Not so much causing a lack of concentration as persistently making him angry. At everyone. 

”What's your damn problem?” Gwen asked when Owen snapped at her for asking a question about the UNIT search engine. 

Tosh was in Jack's office talking or she would have asked her. Ianto was cleaning away the residues from lunch a few feet away. 

”My damn problem is that I'm trying to work here, Gwen! Leave me alone!” He was staying away from the part of his mind that could essentially reach out and order Gwen to go. After the incident with Ianto, he didn't want to use the stone again. That didn't change that it was constantly on his mind. As was the memory of the warm feeling he'd had when he'd used the stone; he needed to feel it again. But part of him, the bigger part of his mind, told him that it was too dangerous. 

Gwen was seething. ”It was a simple question, Owen.” 

Ianto noticed Jack looking through the window of his office towards the two, an irritated frown on his face, and decided to put an end to the argument. He stepped in-between them. ”What is the problem, Gwen?” he asked. ”Maybe I can help.” 

”Go and clean up, tea boy! Let the adults talk!” Owen snapped. 

Ianto turned around to face him, incredulous. ”Excuse me?” 

”No,” Owen answered. Anger and frustration was bubbling up inside of him and he balled his hands. ”I won't excuse you, Ianto,” he snapped. ”I'm tired of excusing you. If Jack wouldn't go for as easy a lay as you are, you wouldn't even be here.” 

Ianto stared at him. Gwen shook her head. ”Asshole!” 

Owen turned to her. ”What? The truth hurts, right?” 

”What are you talking about?” 

”Come on, Gwen. I've never seen someone who wanted to be shagged by Jack Harkness more than you do! It's pathetic! You make goo-goo eyes at Jack while telling everyone how much you love Rhys. And the sad thing is, he prefers Ianto.” 

From behind Owen, Jack said, ”I think we've heard enough.” The doctor turned around to him. Jack was standing in his office door with Tosh at his side staring at Owen as if he were a stranger. ”Back down, Owen,” Jack said and the doctor sneered. 

This thing – this anger inside of him – had him now firmly in its grip and he wouldn't back down. ”That would make it easy for you, right?” 

Jack crossed his arms and stuck his chin out. ”I'm being serious, Owen. Get out. Get a break, take some deep breaths, whatever makes you happy. As long as you come back here without this attitude.” 

”Attitude,” Owen echoed snidely. 

Tosh frowned in confusion. ”What's going on with you?” 

Owen slammed his hand on his table, making her flinch. ”Nothing! Why does there have to be something wrong with me, huh?” 

”Because you're not being yourself, Owen,” Jack answered and Owen watched him take a step to the side, as if he wanted to shield Tosh from his anger. ”Take a break.” He stared at Owen and the doctor felt the anger turn into rage. He barely suppressed a scream, pressing his lips together. He wouldn't stand a chance against Jack. He could see how angry the captain already was. It was no use to provoke him further. The danger that he'd wake up with no memories of the last few years was too big. 

He sneered. “Whatever you say, captain,” he snapped. He ripped his jacket from the back of his chair and Jack returned to his office. Tosh followed him hesitantly. Owen looked at Gwen and Ianto. They looked shocked and a bit disturbed. Pitying. He couldn't stand that look thrown his way. He never had. He reached out a hand and looked into Ianto's eyes while sweeping his coffee cup to the floor. The noise of the mug breaking was followed by the noise of the cog door opening when Owen left. 

”That asshole!” Gwen cursed. 

Ianto just sighed and crouched down to clean up the broken mug. Suddenly, Jack hurried past him and Gwen towards the door. ”Don't you dare touch that, Ianto.” 

”Sir-” 

”Don't touch it, Ianto!” Jack left the Hub and caught Owen entering the tiny elevator leading up to the tourist office. He stepped inside with him and before Owen knew that he was there, Jack had him pinned to the wall with his hands fisted in Owen's jacket. ”I've had it with you today. What is your problem?” 

Owen wanted to yell at him, to hit him, but suddenly, his arms felt heavy and his energy just left him and he was so tired. 

”If I ever again see you treating one of the girls that way or abusing Ianto-” 

”That was hardly abuse,” Owen muttered. 

Jack slammed him against the wall. ”It was.” 

The doors opened, but they didn't get out. Jack stared into Owen's eyes and Owen felt strangely exhausted and ashamed. What had he been thinking? Where had those words come from? He knew that he could be abrasive and curt but … that had been extreme, even for him. 

Jack sneered. ”You have a problem with me, you come to me.” 

Owen was really starting to get nervous. Jack was seldom that angry and almost never at his own team. 

”I have no problem with you.” 

”Then what is the matter with you?” 

”I don't know!” Owen exploded. His shoulders slumped. ”I don't know.” 

He wasn't even aware that he was lying. Subconsciously, he knew what was wrong with him. And it had nothing to do with the team and everything to do with the stone.


	9. Chapter 9

**9.**

 

The rain had stopped but the cutting wind was still there. It ruffled Owen's short hair and made him shiver even though he was wearing his leather jacket. He was leaning on the rail, staring across the bay. Jack didn't even wear his coat but he never seemed to be cold. Sometimes Owen wondered if the coat the captain loved so much was just for show. 

Jack was looking at him, a thoughtful expression on his face. ”I think I get it,” he said. 

Owen sighed. ”Bugger off, would you?” 

”You're acting up. Like a child.” 

Owen turned his head to look at Jack. ”What?” 

”That wasn't supposed to come out as insulting.” 

”Well, it did,” Owen answered. 

Jack tipped his head to the side. ”But it's true, you know. In some way, you're acting up because you don't get the attention you think you deserve. And you're right.” He turned his head to stare across the sea. ”Gwen is new, so I pay extra attention to her. She needs protection and guidance. You don't need either of those things. You protect yourself and you know your way around. And Tosh … she needs me even more than Gwen.” 

Owen snorted. ”I think you're overestimating yourself.” 

”I don't think so. Tosh is fragile. She doesn't have much confidence in herself or in her work, not the way you do, so I praise her a little more than I should. And then there's Ianto: me letting him stay, me not using Retcon on him, me sleeping with him.” 

”Hey, I don't care what you do in your sorry excuse for a bedroom.” Owen didn't comment on the fact that Jack just officially admitted what he'd suspected from the beginning … what Suzie had suspected from the beginning. Ianto and Jack were sleeping together. Until now, he'd used it as a way to make jokes at Ianto's expense. Ianto and Jack had never denied or confirmed it. Somehow, Owen wasn't shocked now that the truth was out. Ianto with his pretty face, those blue eyes and the gentle rejections of Jack's flirting had appeared so unexpectedly in the Hub that on his first day, Suzie had asked Jack during lunch if they'd already shagged or were about to take the plunge. Ianto had blushed, Jack had smiled and ignored the question like he always did when he didn't want to talk about something – or admit to it. 

”I know. But somehow, me sleeping with him is your excuse for hurting him.” 

Owen picked at a splinter on the rail, not looking at Jack. ”I'm not jealous. I don't wanna shag you.” 

”I know,” Jack answered. ”It's just that you're angry because I let him stay even though he messed up – royally – and betrayed us. You think that if you would have been the one hiding a cyberwoman in the basement, I would have given you Retcon, but because Ianto and I had a sexual relationship, I'm keeping him around.” He smiled. ”I don't know if I should be hurt by that. You know, it's not as if I'm not able to find other partners. I'm a damn good-looking guy, I'm charming ... and I like taking walks on the beach.” Owen couldn't help but smile at that. Jack's hand in the nape of his neck was heavy and warm. He was standing so close now, their bodies almost touching and Owen looked up at him. ”But that's not the reason I'm keeping him around. Not at all.” 

”Then what is the reason?” 

Jack sighed. ”Somehow, I tend to hire lost souls. Tosh, you and Ianto … you're special and good guys. You just need a little help.” 

”Oi, if you're the one providing that help, we're really lost,” Owen snickered, feeling a little better. 

Jack shrugged. ”Owen, I think you're a great scientist, a great doctor, a great guy and I took you for granted. I'm sorry. I'll try to change that.” 

”I didn't even know it was bothering me so much,” Owen said. 

”Yeah,” Jack answered, ”that much was obvious. Take a few more minutes, come back to work and apologize. I don't like my kids fighting.” 

Owen nodded and forced a “Sure” around the knot that had formed in his throat. 

”And if Ianto didn't do it already despite me telling him not to, clean away the shattered mug.” With that, Jack turned away but he stopped and then turned back to Owen. ”Just so you know – I would do everything for each and every one of you.” He smiled and headed back towards the tourist office. Owen smiled. He felt calmer and a bit happier than before but there was still something nagging at the back of his mind. He looked down at his hands. They were shaking. Somehow he knew that it wasn't over yet … whatever _it_ was.

***

Owen sighed in annoyance and rolled his eyes at Gwen who giggled. 

Tosh put their drinks on the table and sat down. ”What?” she asked when her colleagues exchanged a look. The pub was crowded and loud, the chatter of the customers made it impossible to identify the song that was playing. 

”The guy who just approached you,” Gwen said. ”What did he want?” 

Tosh looked at the tall, handsome man with the green eyes and the brown leather jacket. ”He wanted to help me with the pints.” 

Owen snorted. Gwen kicked him under the table. ”That's so cute, Tosh,” she said and laughed. Owen was glad that he'd accepted the girls' peace offering to go into the pub with him. He was relaxed and the beer smothered the annoying buzz he'd felt since he'd woken up that morning. 

”Yeah, from what I saw, he wants to get you acquainted with his bedroom.” 

Tosh blushed. ”Guys,” she said and sipped her beer. 

Owen rolled his eyes again. ”What's the matter, Tosh? Go to him, say hello, get laid. I know you need it.” That earned him another vicious kick, this time from Tosh. 

”He's right,” Gwen said. ”Go and talk to him. He's a catch.” 

Tosh shook her head. ”No, guys. Really.” 

”Oh, c'mon!” Gwen said. 

Owen wished that Tosh would lose her shyness. She deserved a boyfriend, she really did. ”Tosh, don't be so uptight. Go over there and talk to him,” he said. She glanced at the guy who was looking at her with a smile from his place at the bar and blushed. Owen could see that she wouldn't do it. 

Before he realized what he was doing, he reached out to her with his mind. 

_Go over there._

She winced slightly, then she got up and headed for the bar. Gwen laughed. ”That's more like it,” she said to Owen and he grinned at her, before hiding a worried frown by taking a sip of his beer. It had almost been as if he'd forced himself to manipulate Tosh and that bothered him a bit. 

But the sudden warmth and happiness over his accomplishment flooding him smothered his worry after a minute. He felt better than he'd felt the whole day. 

Tosh gave a shy smile to the guy and returned to the table. She grabbed her jacket. ”Delwyn invited me to a little restaurant just around the corner.” 

”Woohoo!” Gwen said. ”You see? That wasn't so hard. Hold on to him, he's cute.” 

Tosh smiled shyly. ”Is that okay with you guys?” 

”Dear God, go get laid,” Owen answered and Tosh hurried back to the guy. They watched the two leaving the pub. ”So, what about us?” Owen asked. 

”Us?” Gwen echoed. 

”What are we going to do?” Owen clarified. 

”Me, I'm going to go home to my very own cute catch.” 

Owen pretended to gag on the words and Gwen slapped the back of his head. 

”Hey, careful!” he complained. She waved at him and left. He sighed deeply and contemplated picking up a girl himself, but he felt tired. So he finished his beer and left. The cold night air made him shiver and he zipped his jacket closed before shoving his hands in his jeans pocket. His fingers encountered the smooth surface of the stone and Owen pulled it out. He kept walking, looking down at the stone. He should put it back and never use it again, but he'd done something good with it today. He'd convinced Tosh to chat up a nice-looking guy and if that wasn't an accomplishment, he'd never seen one. 

He sighed deeply and smiled at the memory of the warmth flooding his whole body after he'd ordered Tosh to talk to Delwyn. It had felt good. Too good to give up. He'd felt as if he'd finally given in to a craving he'd had all day. He would stay away from Ianto and Jack, but he could keep the stone and use it to do good things. Right. He could do that. There was no reason to give the stone away. No reason to tell Jack about it, either. 

Owen rejected the doctor in him who whispered, _'Think about it. It makes you feel good when you use it. You feel miserable when you haven't used it in a while. Some kind of addiction, mate. Like those junkies you treated in the past.'_

That was ridiculous of course. He wasn't addicted. He could stop any time he wanted. 

He just didn't want to.


	10. Chapter 10

**10.**

 

The next morning brought a splitting headache but as soon as he'd convinced his neighbour to leave her husband after another fight he'd heard through his paper thin walls he felt great. And he'd done a good thing, too: the guy was a jerk and she was too beautiful to be with him. 

The Hub was quiet the whole day, everyone immersed in their own projects or paperwork. But the over-all mood was good. Jack let them go home a little earlier and Owen decided that he should put his project of getting Ianto a girlfriend into motion. 

He left the Hub through the tourist office where Ianto was doing paperwork. ”Hey, mate! You want to go to a pub with me?” 

Ianto looked at him as if he wasn't sure that Owen had been talking to him. 

”C'mon, Ianto, don't say no. Tosh has a date and Gwen's going to the movies with Rhys. And Jack's ...” Owen hesitated. ”... doing whatever he does when he's having fun.” 

”He informed me that he would spend some time on the roof of the Millennium Centre,” Ianto answered. 

”Whatever,” Owen said. He made a conscious effort not to manipulate Ianto. The last thing he needed right now was another psi shock. 

”Alright,” Ianto said. ”But I have to stay on-call. Jack's not sure if the intruder will be back.” 

”Mate, we're always on-call.”

***

Turned out that Ianto was in fact good company when he wasn't in the Hub working. He'd left his suit jacket and tie in his car and was wearing his shirt untucked over the suit trousers. He laughed and joked, telling stories about Jack misbehaving during UNIT conferences which Owen was sure he wasn't supposed to know. Owen enjoyed the evening … except in those few minutes when he didn't. 

”What was that about?” he asked in irritation when Ianto returned from the bar with two pints and sat down. 

”What?” Ianto asked, clearly puzzled. 

”The girl. She's the third one you've turned down tonight.” And even though Owen felt happier than he'd ever been after using the stone on the women, he was a bit frustrated with the lack of enthusiasm Ianto was showing. 

Ianto stared into his beer. ”Oh!” He shrugged. ”I don't fancy her.” 

”She's gorgeous. And she's interested in you.” Owen had made sure that all of the women he'd let approach Ianto had been showing interest without him interfering. He liked to think that he was just giving them a push in the right direction. 

”She is gorgeous,” Ianto nodded. ”All of them are. I … just don't fancy them.” 

”Okay,” Owen relented and looked around. He spotted another pair of interested eyes focussed on Ianto. 

”What about him, then?” he asked. Tall and handsome, with blue eyes and a dazzling smile. He looked a bit like Jack. 

Ianto blushed. ”What's it with you?” 

”I just want to help you get a sex life.” 

”I don't need a sex life,” Ianto answered. 

Owen raised his eyebrows. ”Mate, everyone needs a sex life.” 

”Well, I don't.” Ianto stared out the window. 

Owen sighed. ”Is this about Lisa, then?” 

Ianto didn't answer. 

”Or is it about Jack?” 

Ianto shook his head. ”I'm tired. See you tomorrow.” He left the pub before Owen could stop him. The doctor cursed and grabbed his jacket before following him. 

Ianto was just putting on his coat and entering a small alleyway that would lead him back towards their cars. 

Owen grabbed his wrist about half-way along the deserted street. ”Ianto, seriously … that thing with Jack won't work out.” 

Ianto stared at him. ”What? Owen, this is not about Jack at all. I just … I don't feel comfortable dating at the moment. Now let it go.” He turned away. 

Owen lost control. ”Ianto, stop.” 

_Stop, damn it!_

Before he could stop it, he slammed against Ianto's barriers. Red-hot pain struck him and he heard a choked scream from Ianto. He gasped and closed his eyes, stumbling against a wall. It hadn't felt like that the last time, had it? Why now, then?

The pounding behind his eyes got worse and he fell to the wet pavement. He was hurting, he just wanted it to stop and retreat, but he couldn't. It was as if he couldn't control himself and suddenly, there was a new feeling bubbling up. Owen gave a helpless laugh as warmth and happiness flooded him. He didn't know how but he knew that he'd managed to make a crack in Ianto's barriers and it was widening and it felt so good to try and destroy Ianto's shield. It was like a game, really. He felt Ianto try to push him away but Owen didn't let him. ”Gonna get you,” he whispered. He felt stronger than the last time he'd tried this. Maybe that was why it hurt, because he was getting closer to breaking Ianto's barriers. The crack was getting wider and Owen heard Ianto sob and suddenly, he realized what he was doing. 

He was hurting him. ”Stop it.” 

But he couldn't. He got dizzy, he got … _'high, dear God, just like a junkie'_ and it felt so good. 

But he couldn't do it. It was destroying Ianto. It took all his effort to retreat and he choked on a sob as darkness descended. The last thing he heard was a voice inside his head that sounded suspiciously like Ianto's but so much weaker and broken. 

_Who are you?_

***

Tosh smiled at Delwyn when he parked in front of her apartment building. ”Thank you,” she said. 

He grinned. ”No problem.” He cut the motor and turned sideways in his seat. ”So ...” 

”So …,” she answered slowly. 

He smiled. ”I'd like to see you again.” 

She blushed. ”Yeah, well ...” She didn't know how to say this. He was incredibly nice, a real gentleman, holding doors open and such, he was handsome but … he was plain boring. Tosh had caught herself thinking about her problem with the computer program at work more than once. And that didn't seem right. ”You know, I …” Her cell phone rang and she smiled apologetically. ”I think I'll have to take that call.” 

There was only one person that could be calling at this time of night. 

He shrugged. ”I'll wait.” 

She looked at the display and took the call. ”Jack, what is-” 

_”I got a distress beacon from Ianto. I need you now. Where are you?”_

”Home.” 

_”I'm almost at Gwen's. I'll pick you up in ten.”_ He disconnected the call. 

Tosh looked at Delwyn. ”It's an emergency. Work, you know.” She opened the door. 

”Hey! I'll call you, okay?” he asked. 

Tosh didn't have the heart to tell him no without having the time to properly explain why. Her worry for Ianto was clouding everything at the moment. She thought that she could endure one more date before gently rejecting him. ”Sure.” She slammed the door and watched Delwyn drive off. 

She waited on the curb until the SUV screeched to a stop beside her, then got into the back seat and powered up the computers surrounding her. ”I'm tracing his beacon,” she said and while the computer was searching, she found her earpiece in her bag and received her gun from Gwen who was in the passenger seat. Jack was already driving towards the city centre on a hunch at break-neck speed. 

The beacon was a device a little smaller than a cell. They all carried one. It was only used when they didn't have the chance to use the cell to call for backup. Usually, that meant that whatever it was, it was really bad. That's why Jack wasn't going alone after Ianto. Distress beacons called for the whole team. 

”Where's Owen?” Tosh asked. 

”He's not answering his phone,” Gwen said when Jack gave no sign of answering. ”Maybe he's with Ianto.” 

”Well, in that case, got them,” Tosh said and started to give directions.

***

Owen pushed the button of the distress beacon again for good measure. He couldn't be sure that Ianto had already done it. But if he had, Jack and the others would be there soon and with them his emergency bag stashed in the SUV. 

He brushed a trembling hand through his wet hair, not aware of the falling rain or the cold wind. ”Come on,” he whispered and enclosed Ianto's hand in both of his. ”Keep breathing. That's it.” There wasn't much he could do. The syringe with the Tiramin was in the SUV and psi shock couldn't be treated any other way. Torchwood One had been trying to find a more reliable therapy but then Canary Wharf had happened. 

He checked Ianto's pulse, glancing at the pale face with the half-opened unseeing eyes and cursed. ”Keep breathing. Keep breathing.” 

Screeching tires and fast footfalls, then Jack's voice. ”Tosh, get Owen's bag.” Jack knelt down beside Owen and looked into Ianto's eyes. ”It's happened again,” he said. 

Owen nodded. ”He's alive. Only just.” 

Ianto's breaths got shallower every minute and his pulse weaker. Owen was sure that with CPR, he could bring Ianto back if he stopped breathing but with psi shock, there was another danger. The longer they waited for the injection, the bigger the danger was that Ianto wouldn't wake up anymore. 

Psi shock attacked the brain like a poison. The over-active reaction to another mind in one's head was immediate. When the intruder was banned or withdrew, the brain froze, overwhelmed and damaged by the mind's panic reaction. The Tiramin helped to get the BP elevated to battle the body's symptoms and there was an antidote in it Torchwood One had managed to develop after they'd encountered an alien drug. It helped to treat the psi shock itself, stopping the brain from shutting down completely, instead forcing it to just fulfil basic functions for a few hours. That resulted in drowsiness and the victims slept while the brain was recovering. 

Jack had said that in some galaxies, getting into another one's mind was an art. Owen could understand why. The more subtle an intruder was, the less the victim's mind and body was damaged. Intruding without killing. Intruding without anyone the wiser. The ultimate weapon. But Owen knew that he wasn't subtle. It took years of training to make mind control an art. In comparison, he was just playing around – with Ianto's life on the line. 

Tosh shoved Owen's bag into his hands. He opened it and located the correct syringe. Jack had propped Ianto up against his chest and was holding both his hands enclosed in his. Owen knew that time was running out. He went for the not so elegant solution and jammed the syringe into Ianto's thigh. The archivist didn't even wince, caught in his mind's panic attack. They waited. There was nothing more they could do. With the rain falling down upon them, no one was able to see Owen's tears.


	11. Chapter 11

**11.**

 

Ianto gasped awake and screamed out. He scrabbled for a hold, something, and found hands that were clutching back, reassuring him and anchoring him. 

”It's okay,” he heard someone say. He was cold and for some reason, he was wet, too. He whimpered when he saw dark shadows moving around him and closed his eyes. His head was turned gently, he smelled wet wool and he knew that Jack was there. With that knowledge, he drifted off. 

Gwen looked around the deserted alley, brushing wet strands of hair out of her face. ”We should leave. Get him somewhere warm.” 

Jack nodded and shifted his hold, picking Ianto up carefully. 

”I'll be in the back with him,” Owen said. Gwen thought that he was strangely subdued but maybe he was just worried. 

”Alright,” Jack answered. ”Tosh, you too.” 

She nodded. 

The SUV was warm. Owen dug a blanket out from under the passenger seat nevertheless and covered Ianto who was sleeping with his head on Tosh's thigh and his legs curled between Tosh and Owen's bodies. Her fingers were carding through his hair gently. 

Jack waited until Owen had buckled up before he started the car. ”Tell me what happened,” he said. 

Owen had dreaded this moment. ”There was … I don't know really. One second he was okay, walking beside me, the next … he wasn't.” 

Jack glanced into the rear-view mirror. ”Did he say something?” 

Owen swallowed. ”We were … kinda arguing.” 

”Arguing? What about?” 

”Is that important?” 

”I guess not,” Jack relented and sighed deeply. ”This is a problem. We can't detect the use of mental abilities and we can't protect Ianto.” 

Gwen looked at him, clearly shocked. ”But there has got to be something we can do.” 

”No, there isn't,” Jack answered. ”Believe me. I know. The only thing we can hope for is for Ianto to be able to identify the intruder.” 

”Is that possible?” Gwen asked. 

”Two minds merging into one, Gwen … not only is the intruder in Ianto's mind but Ianto is in the intruder's mind as well. Ianto was trained to search for clues, but he's out of practice, I don't know if he was able to get a good enough look.” 

”Okay,” Gwen said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world to use mind control. Owen assumed that she was silently freaking out, trying to find out if she'd been influenced. He was feeling sick. 

Gwen glanced back at Ianto. ”The last time that happened … did he find something?” 

”Yeah,” Jack answered, ”but it wasn't enough to identify him.” 

”Jack …,” Owen said, then he choked on his words. He couldn't tell Jack. The captain would have a fit. 

But he needed to. Jack thought that there was someone out there trying to get to Torchwood. Owen had to tell him that this wasn't the case. 

But if he told him, Jack would take away the stone and … 

”What is it, Owen?” Jack asked when he drove into the underground parking lot of Torchwood. 

Owen took a breath, bracing himself. ”I want to run a full check-up on Ianto first thing tomorrow … just in case.” 

”Agreed,” Jack answered. Owen nodded, not sure why he'd lied. Subconsciously, he knew though. He knew that he couldn't be without the high the stone was giving him. And the biggest high of all had been trying to get into Ianto's mind.

***

It was only when Owen stopped in front of Tosh's apartment building that he remembered that she had been on a date tonight. ”Hey, how did things go with Delwyn?” 

Tosh hesitated and bit her lip. ”Okay, I guess.” 

”Okay, you guess,” Owen repeated. ”Sounds … not so good.” 

Tosh sighed and leaned back in her seat. ”I don't know. He's just ...” 

”Not hot?” 

”He's a looker.” 

”Stupid?” 

”Not at all.” 

”Can't get it up?” 

”Gosh, Owen!” She hit his arm. ”We haven't even properly snogged yet.” 

”So, what is it?” Owen asked. 

”He's boring.” 

”What? That's all?” 

Tosh shook her head. ”You know, some of us enjoy a decent conversation once in a while.” 

”You can have decent conversations with me. Then you can go home and get shagged through the mattress by him. The best of two worlds.” 

She grinned. ”Jerk!” Then she shook her head. ”I'll tell him the next time we see each other. Didn't have the time tonight.” 

”Yeah, sorry about that.” 

”It's not your fault.” She opened the door. ”Thanks for giving me a ride.” 

”You're welcome.” 

She slammed the door shut and Owen was left to his own thoughts. He rested his head against the wheel and sighed deeply. ”What am I gonna do?”

***

Jack sat down at the edge of his bed and sighed deeply, looking down at Ianto. The archivist swallowed and tried to hide how nervous he was. 

Jack put the two syringes he'd brought with him on the bedside table. 

”We could call Owen.” 

”I don't want anyone else here for this,” Ianto answered.

”Okay,” Jack answered. ”Your call.” 

”Your plan,” Ianto answered. 

Jack hesitated. ”Maybe we should wait. You're still recovering.” 

”We can't afford waiting. The memories are fresh.” 

The captain nodded. ”Your hands are shaking,” he said. 

Ianto nodded. ”I know.” He sat up and leaned against the wall. 

Jack took one of the syringes and Ianto held his arm out. Jack hesitated. ”We could do without.” 

”We couldn't,” Ianto answered earnestly. ”There' too much going on … in my head at the moment.” 

Jack could understand that. With Lisa and the suspension, the team being cautious around Ianto, the self-loathing the younger man was probably going through, Jack's refusal to let him come as close as before Lisa happened and now this new threat … Ianto had to be a mess of memories and emotions. And he wouldn't be able to keep his barriers down when he was so nervous and confused. That's why they used the sedative: it would help Ianto to relax and keep his barriers down thus enabling Jack to enter Ianto's mind without causing a psi shock. 

Jack injected the sedative and put the syringe on his bedside table, before he thought better of it and stashed it in the drawer for the time being. ”Don't want to grab the wrong one if something happens,” he explained. Ianto nodded, looking at the remaining syringe with the Tiramin. 

Jack slid closer to him, feeling the need to reassure the younger man, ”I'll be careful.” 

When Jack had been born, in 51st century, humans had mixed with other races from all over the universe and had developed a natural gift for reaching out to others' minds. But Ianto was a man from 21st century and Jack could see why the thought of letting someone in willingly would bother him. 

Ianto cleared his throat. ”I know.”

Jack noticed that Ianto's eyes were becoming slightly unfocussed. His hands were still trembling though. 

”Are you scared?” 

Ianto avoided Jack's eyes. 

”Ianto?” 

”I never let someone in willingly.” 

Jack slid his free hand to the nape of Ianto's neck and looked into his eyes, deciding to be honest with him. ”It's intimate. You're going to get a glimpse into my mind and I'm going to get a glimpse into yours.” He slid his hand up and cupped Ianto's cheek, pressing his forefinger against Ianto's temple. ”I'm going to take a look at your memories of the attacks. I won't be able to find them on my own, though. You have to help me. I'm not going to access memories you don't want me to see or try to control you. But it can happen that memories get triggered and … I'll try to look away. This is about trust, Ianto.” 

Ianto's eyes were closing and when he sagged, Jack pulled him closer, leaning him against his chest, one hand cradling his head. Ianto's cheek rested on Jack's shoulder and he breathed deeply. 

”You awake?” 

”Yes, sir.” 

”I want you to squeeze my hand, Ianto. Concentrate on that. I gave you just enough to get drowsy but you can't sleep, okay? Dreams are the worst that can happen right now. What do I want you to do?” 

”Squeeze your hand to let you know if I'm still awake, sir.” Ianto sounded tired and his body was heavy against Jack's chest. 

”Right,” Jack answered and closed his eyes to relax. It had been a while since he'd done something like this. He was a bit nervous and pretty sure that he wouldn't be if it was Tosh sitting here with him or Owen … but it was Ianto of all people. 

Ianto sniffed. ”You smell good.” 

Jack laughed softly. ”Thanks for that, Mr. Jones.” 

”I shouldn't have said that.” 

”You're loopy,” Jack answered. ”Just … be still and we'll be fine.” He caught himself nuzzling Ianto's hair and cleared his throat. ”Okay, start squeezing my hand, Ianto.” He waited for a minute to be sure that Ianto didn't fall asleep. Then he whispered, ”I'm going to get started now.” 

”Will it hurt?” 

”You won't feel a thing as long as your barrier stays down. Psi shock ...” 

”... happens only when the barrier is up, I know. We had a cute instructor in Torchwood One.” 

Jack laughed. 

”Right,” Ianto said. ”Shutting up now.” 

Jack closed his eyes, concentrated and reached out for Ianto's mind. It was as easy as opening a door when there was no barrier hindering an intruder from gaining access. It would be so easy to take over control now and finally do something Jack had wanted to do for so long – have a thorough look at Ianto from the inside, see how the other man worked and where he came from. But Ianto was showing him so much trust by letting him do this. Jack felt obliged to not abuse it. 

Jack frowned and pulled Ianto closer. ”Feel me?”

”Yes.” 

”Going deeper in now.” Jack was attacked by emotions and memories, but they were weak and uncoordinated and he managed to rid himself of them to focus on his task. 

His fingers stroked Ianto's hairline while he tried to find the memories he was looking for. ”You have to remember, Ianto.” 

_Lisa was laughing._

Jack shied away from the memory.

”Sorry,” Ianto said. His body got tense. ”Wait.” 

”Take your time.”

There it was. Jack frowned and pulled the memory of Owen and a pub closer. ”This it?” he asked softly. 

Ianto nodded.

_”Is this about Lisa, then?”_

Jack felt Ianto trying to grab the memory back but Jack held on to it. ”Ianto, I have to look at it.”

_”Or is it about Jack?”_

”I'm sorry,” Ianto whispered. Jack just watched.

_”Ianto, seriously … that thing with Jack won't work out.”_

Jack flinched when the attack happened and slipped an arm around Ianto's chest, trying to find whatever the intruder had left behind in Ianto's mind. ”Damn, he's strong,” Jack muttered. 

Ianto nodded. ”Stronger than the first time.”

When Ianto in the memory reached out to the mind of the intruder, he found fear, anger, need and confusion. Jack looked through the emotions, trying to find something Ianto had overlooked – a hint, a trace, anything – but there was nothing. ”The other one,” he said. 

_He saw himself in his office with Ianto standing next to him._

He shook his head when he didn't find anything other than what Ianto had told him. ”You're clearly out of practice. There's not much to find.” 

”Sorry. I shouldn't have stopped practising after London.”

Jack couldn't help but smile. “Yeah, you're not the type to neglect anything.”

_A lamp in the corner was the only source of light in the room but Jack was still able to see a mess of bottles and glasses on the coffee table, paper, videos and newspapers were littering the floor._

_Ianto was carrying a big plastic bag, trying to clean up a room that was a lost cause._

_There was a girl sitting on the couch, maybe 18 years old, watching him. “Dad doesn't want you to do that.“_

_Ianto answered,“Well, he isn't doing anything to keep the place clean, is he?“_

Jack pushed the memory away, but he yould hear the girl answering.

_“Are you trying to provoke him? Even after what happened the last time?“_

Jack felt Ianto's body getting tense and he decided to ignore the memory. He prepared to leave Ianto's mind and said, “We'll work on your abilities. I could help you.“

The memory of the shooting range from a few weeks ago came on so suddenly that Jack grabbed it before he realized what he was doing. 

_They were standing close to each other, Ianto with a gun in his hand and Jack admiring his precise hits on the cardboard Weevil._

Jack was in Ianto's memories, he could _feel_ Ianto blush and his own mind provided him with the reason. 

_His hands on Ianto's hips, his fingers digging into his waist gently._

He'd seen Ianto's hand tremble when he'd taken the shots and remembered that he'd smiled, sniffing Ianto's hair. Suddenly, he was back in the range, reliving the memory. 

_Feeling himself pulling Ianto closer, nuzzling his neck._

Their memories collided and melted, drawing them in and Jack forgot where he was and that he was supposed to be retreating because this was private and precious. It had to be because it was so sharp, as if it happened an hour ago. 

_The kiss was passionate, Ianto's skin under the unbuttoned shirt so warm and the cool, moist walls of the shooting range an interesting contrast. Ianto gasped when Jack's hand slid into his trousers and the gun fell to the sandy ground, unnoticed. Jack felt warm and happy and affection and he remembered those feelings. But there was also the memory of sadness and shame and he wondered where those feelings came from. He pulled Ianto into another kiss. Suddenly, there was something much bigger. Bigger than affection, maybe something like … love._

Jack shied away and left Ianto's mind and his perch on the bed. ”Sorry,” he gasped and turned away. ”I shouldn't have-” 

”I didn't stop you,” Ianto said and when Jack turned around, he saw Ianto sitting on the edge of the bed, his head in his hands, looking utterly miserable.

”Those were your feelings,” Jack said. 

Ianto rubbed his face. Then he got up. ”I have to leave.” 

He stumbled and Jack pushed him back down. ”You can't. You're still sedated.”

Ianto got up again. ”Just let me sleep on the couch.” He didn't wait for Jack's response, just pushed past him and went up the ladder. Jack felt forced to climb up behind him and make sure that he didn't fall. He watched Ianto drop on the couch and provided him with a blanket. Ianto wrapped himself in it and closed his eyes. 

Jack stood next to the couch, unsure what to do. ”Those were your feelings.”

Ianto burrowed deeper under the blanket. ”Please, sir.”

Jack nodded reluctantly. ”Alright. Sorry.”

”You have nothing to be sorry for, Captain.” 

Jack sighed and brushed a hand through his hair. ”You sleep. We'll talk about the next steps concerning the threat in a few hours before the others arrive.”

”Alright.” 

Jack went to his office and dimmed the lights in the main Hub. Then he pressed the back of his hand against his lips. Those had been Ianto's feelings: sadness, shame … and something akin to love. He'd known of course, at least suspected, that Ianto wasn't the type for casual sex, but Ianto had told him that he didn't want more and Jack had believed him. 

Ianto stared into the almost-darkness of the Hub. He shouldn't have lost control. Jack shouldn't know this. Ianto had been scared after that encounter in the shooting range. Love was something he shouldn't have developed for Jack Harkness. He'd spent that night at Lisa's side, reading to her and trying to make it up to her even though she had no idea what was wrong. He'd told her that he loved her before leaving for work the next morning. It hadn't been a lie. 

But when Jack had asked him a few days later if he was sure that their 'casual sex only'-rule was really what Ianto wanted – because Jack had known deep down, of course, Jack always knew – Ianto had told him 'yes' … and _that_ had been a lie.

***

Owen was in front of his toilet, a shaking mess of sweaty hair and tangled limbs. The violent nausea that had woken him half an hour ago was gone now and he was exhausted. There was something wrong with him. There had to be. He'd never thought that he would lie to Jack over such a big thing or that he would attack one of his colleagues. Everything was wrong and he felt miserable and … he needed. 

He needed so bad it hurt. He needed to do it again. He needed to break Ianto. And when he was done with him he could try to do the same with Jack. 

Owen smiled.


	12. Chapter 12

**12.**

 

“Morning!” Gwen called out when she saw Jack as soon as she entered the Hub. 

”Boardroom in ten minutes,” was his answer and with that, he headed for the tourist office. 

Gwen looked questioningly at Tosh and Owen. ”What did I do wrong?” 

”He's been antsy ever since I got here,” Tosh answered. ”Can't be Ianto. He's upstairs and fine.” 

Owen was staring at his screen as if he was trying to control the computer through sheer force of will. He looked pale and tired. 

”Hey! You alright, Owen?” Gwen asked. 

”Yeah,” Owen muttered, ”just great.” 

Gwen looked at Tosh who rolled her eyes. ”Guys!” she sighed. 

Gwen nodded. ”Can't live with them, can't live without them.” 

”Well, at least you have one of them to live with you.” 

They smiled and their discussion on the Plass the day before yesterday was in the past. 

Jack returned from the tourist office. ”Hey!” he admonished. ”Boardroom! Phones on the table in front of you.” 

Tosh and Gwen shared a look. Jack was rarely rude or a strict boss, something had to be up. 

Just a few minutes later, Jack was standing at the head of the table in the boardroom, staring at his three field agents with a dark look. On the table were five cell phones. Even Ianto's was there even though the archivist himself was curiously absent. 

”Ianto had problems remembering details about the intruder. After the attack yesterday, he told me that he was uncertain if he remembered everything correctly. I wanted to make sure. So I went into his mind to have a closer look at his memories from the attacks.” 

”You did what?” Tosh asked, clearly shocked. 

Gwen leaned forward. ”Did he have another psi shock?” 

”No,” Jack answered, ”we did it the safe way.” 

When no dirty joke from Owen was forthcoming, Gwen shot him a questioning look. The doctor had gone even paler and was staring at the table. She frowned, when Gwen returned her gaze to Jack, he had his arms crossed. ”Ianto lowered his barriers and let me in. I know how to enter minds and together, we were able to revisit his memories from the attacks, especially those moments when he held on to the intruder's mind to identify him. He let me in willingly. No psi shock. He's fine.” 

The door opened and Ianto entered as if to prove his point, a tray with four cups in his hands. 

”Unfortunately,” Jack continued and gifted Ianto with a small smile when the younger man served him his cup of coffee, “I didn't find anything new.” 

Tosh frowned and sipped her coffee. Ianto left the boardroom. 

Jack sighed. ”Fact is that we can't protect Ianto. He's in danger.”

Owen felt nauseous again and panicky. The room was getting too small for his liking and he shifted uncomfortably in his chair. 

”Okay,” Gwen said. ”What are we gonna do to catch him?”

Jack sighed. ”You tell me.”

Gwen looked at Tosh, then back at Jack. ”You … you don't know.” 

Jack shrugged. Owen got up from his chair so suddenly that it toppled over. ”I'm gonna be sick,” he gasped and ran from the boardroom. Gwen, Jack and Tosh looked after him in confusion. Ianto returned to the boardroom with a file and a laptop. 

Jack shook his head. ”This has been going on for too long. The last time he reached out he managed to crack Ianto's barrier, it's only a matter of time until he gets in. There is only one thing we can do.” He took the laptop and file from Ianto. ”Thank you.” 

”I locked up the office.”

”Alright.” 

”Jack?” Gwen asked uncertainly when she recognized the file to be Ianto's. ”What are you doing?”

”I need at least two witnesses,” the captain explained.

”What for?” Tosh asked. 

Ianto clasped his hands behind his back and answered, ”Protocol 39.” 

”Wha … what is 39?” Gwen asked. 

Tosh looked at Jack as if he'd gone mad. ”Jack … you can't do that.”

”I can.”

”What?” Gwen asked. 

Jack looked at her. ”I'm going to take Ianto's access rights. We're going to change all the codes. Ianto won't be allowed to look into any files except those I grant him access to. He won't have any of the new codes so that he can't enter the armoury, the cells or any other vital rooms in this building. And he won't be allowed to leave the Hub.” 

Tosh looked at Gwen. ”That's a nice description for telling us that he's keeping Ianto as a prisoner.”

Gwen stared at the archivist who was standing in a corner of the boardroom, looking as if Jack had just announced that he wanted sugar in his coffee instead of milk – unruffled and calm. She took it upon herself to protest. ”You can't do that, Jack. You can't keep him here.”

”Gwen, let it go,” Jack said.

”No, I won't. You are taking him into custody? He didn't do anything wrong.”

”He's a danger to this base. Tosh, you have to activate the protocol.” He stepped away from the laptop and looked at her. Tosh hesitated for a moment and shared a look with Ianto. He smiled and nodded ever so slightly. Tosh sighed and got up. 

Gwen grabbed her arm. ”Don't.” 

”Gwen-” 

”He didn't do anything wrong. You can't make him a prisoner for something he didn't even do.”

”Gwen ...” It was Ianto who spoke this time. ”It's okay. I agreed to this.”

”It's not okay.” She addressed Jack. “How long will he have to stay here?”

”Until the problem's been solved.”

”You just said that it can't be solved. That we can't find him. What does that mean for Ianto?”

”He'll be here as long as it takes.”

”Weeks? Months?”

”As long as it takes, Gwen.” He said her name with a dangerous edge to his voice. 

Gwen stared at him incredulously. ”This is not right. Don't, Jack.”

Tosh pried Gwen's fingers from her arm and went to the laptop. She typed in a few commands. ”Changing the codes and sending them to our phones.”

Jack looked at Gwen when four cell phones on the table announced a text message. Ianto's remained mute. Jack kept staring at Gwen. ”You'll have to let me watch you delete the message as soon as you've memorized the new codes. That has to happen before you leave this base today.”

She looked at him pleadingly. ”Jack, don't do that.”

”Someone is able to gain access to Ianto's mind. To the codes. We can't do anything about the information of the base's layout but we can damn well make sure that the intruders won't get the base served on a silver platter!” He addressed Tosh. ”You'll have to make sure that all the defences are updated as soon as we're done here.” 

She nodded and stepped away from the laptop. Jack opened Ianto's file. ”Sign this,” he said to Gwen, sliding a form to her. ”I need the signature of at least two active Torchwood agents to make Protocol 39 official.”

Gwen looked at Ianto who smiled at her reassuringly. She shook her head. ”I can't do that.”

”I would ask Owen, but he's still puking his guts out. So please, Gwen. Now.”

She looked at Tosh and Ianto, then back at Jack. Tosh took he form and signed it first, before holding the pen out to Gwen. She sighed and signed it, too. Then she angrily grabbed her phone and left the boardroom. Jack sighed deeply, looking after her with a frown. Tosh closed the laptop and picked it and her phone up. ”I'm going to check the security system now.” 

”Thanks, Tosh,” Jack answered. She nodded at him and smiled at Ianto before she left the room. Jack pocketed his own phone and Owen's then he watched Ianto add Protocol 39 to his file and close it, making sure that no piece of paper was sticking out. 

Jack slid an arm around Ianto's shoulders and kissed his forehead. ”This isn't forever.” 

”I know that.”

”Good,” Jack answered. Ianto handed him his own phone. Jack took it. ”You'll get it back as soon as this is over.” He looked uncomfortable for a moment.”I turned off the phone in the archives. Don't use any of the other phones without permission, okay? You can use your earpiece, but be aware that all outgoing calls and radio frequencies are monitored.” 

”Yes, sir. What should I do now?” Ianto answered.

”Clean up the boardroom and …” Jack sighed deeply. ”Looks like I'll have to do my own paperwork for a while.” 

”Yes, sir,” Ianto answered.

”Use the time to organize the archives. That should be okay.”

Ianto nodded. Jack sighed. ”I'm gonna find Owen and see what's keeping him.”

***

Owen looked at his pale face in the mirror of the bathroom and fought a new wave of nausea down. He felt rotten. The stone was clasped in his right hand and he was fighting the urge to shove it back into his jeans pocket. He had to tell Jack about it. Now. 

He couldn't. It felt too good when he used the stone. Besides, the stone gave him the unique opportunity to have a look into Ianto's twisted little head. With some luck, he'd discover what the archivist was planning next, now that his cybergirlfriend was dead. Once a traitor, always a traitor, right? He was a liability, Jack should have given him Retcon.

Owen shuddered. There was something in him, another Owen. He wanted to keep the stone and use it. Preferably on Ianto because it felt so damn good to try and break down his defences, it was like a high, a rush … 

But the other Owen, the doctor and team mate, he couldn't do this any more. Sneaking behind his team's backs and using them, manipulating them. 

It didn't matter. When were they ever giving him the time of a day? They saw him as a cynical bastard without a heart, so why should he care? 

Because _they_ did. He knew deep down that they did care about him. Maybe even Ianto. His hand tightened its hold around the stone and Owen fought his own body to move for the door and just tell someone. Tell them. Because there was something wrong. Horribly wrong. This wasn't him. 

Or was it? 

”Owen!” 

Startled, he whirled around to face Jack. 

”What's wrong?” the captain asked. 

Owen tried to raise his hand and show him the stone, only to realize that he wasn't. The stone was shoved into his jeans pocket casually. ”Nothing, Jack,” he lied. ”Had a bit too much to drink last night.” 

Jack frowned. ”Well, don't make this a habit. We need you in the field.” Jack handed him his cell. ”Protocol 39 is active. Ianto's compromised.” He turned away to leave. 

Owen stopped him with a hand on his arm. ”You were really in Ianto's mind last night?” 

Jack turned around and frowned. ”Yeah,” he said. 

”How did it feel?” Owen wanted to know. He needed to know.

Jack crossed his arms. ”That's not something I'm going to talk about, Owen, and I don't want you to make any jokes to Ianto about it, understood? It is the most intimate you can be with another person and I don't want you to make him uncomfortable.” He turned away and left. 

Owen snarled. ”Sure, you care about _him_ ,” he muttered. ”No one cares about me.” He looked back into the mirror. He repeated it, sad and slowly. ”No one cares about me. Or they would have noticed.” He was just a bastard to them, heartless … an emotional cripple. ”I bet it felt good.” He smiled and sighed. ”I bet it felt great.” 

And with that, Owen the doctor and team mate got lost in the memory of a high better than he'd ever had, and in the wish to experience it again.


	13. Chapter 13

**13.**

 

“We've got a Weevil in Victoria Park,” Jack said, leaving his office wearing his coat and checking for his Webley. ”Gwen, you're with me.”

She grabbed her jacket and followed him out to the SUV. Owen and Tosh watched them go. Owen opened the CCTV on his screen ad flicked through the cameras until he found the archives. Ianto was standing between two shelves and seemed to be sorting through some boxes. Owen's fingers were trembling while he looked at the footage and he closed his eyes to reach out mentally to Ianto.

”Owen!” Tosh interrupted him and he turned to look at her worried face. ”You alright? You seem to be a bit pale.” 

”I'm fine,” he answered. The need tore at him.

”Are you sure?” Tosh asked.

”I just told you I'm fine!” he snapped, got up and left the main Hub without another word. The dimly lit corridors that led down to the archives seemed to stretch and mock him. The way was getting longer with every step he took. 

He began to run.

***

Ianto cursed softly when the box slipped out of his hands and landed on the floor, spilling its contents. ”How did they even manage without a proper filing system?” he asked himself. He crouched down to gather up the mess. 

_”Ianto,”_ Jack said over the earpiece. 

He answered, ”Yes?” 

_”I'm on my way with Gwen to fetch a Weevil. Owen and Tosh are upstairs.”_

”Alright.” 

Jack disconnected and Ianto continued to go through the contents of the box. 

A movement out of the corner of his eye made him flinch and he got up. ”Owen!” he gasped. ”You scared me. I didn't hear you come in.” The doctor stared at him darkly. Ianto straightened his suit jacket. ”What? What is it?”

Owen held up a hand. ”Look what I found.” He was holding a milky white stone. 

Ianto reached out a hand. ”Yes, the box fell down. It must have rolled away. Thanks.”

Owen didn't move. ”You think you're so clever,” he said. 

Ianto frowned. ”Excuse me?”

”Shagging the boss.”

Ianto rolled his eyes. ”We are not getting into that discussion again, right? Owen, I-”

”Shut up!” When the doctor moved towards him, Ianto took a step back. Owen stopped and grinned. ”Traitor. You are hiding something from us.”

”I … no,” Ianto answered. ”Owen, you're scaring me.”

”Let me take a look into your mind.”

”What?” Ianto took a step backwards.

”That way I can see if you're hiding something.”

”I'm not hiding anything. Jack was in my mind yesterday. He would have noticed if I hid anything, don't you think?”

Owen snorted. ”Yeah, right. Our trusted leader. As long as you whore yourself for him he won't do a thing. It's pathetic, really.”

The words stung and Ianto swallowed. ”It's not like that.”

”Really?” Owen asked. ”What is it like then, Ianto?” 

Ianto heard light footfalls and then Tosh appeared behind Owen. She frowned. ”What's going on here?”

Ianto breathed a sigh of relief. ”Tosh, I think there's something wrong with Owen.”

”Tosh!” Owen snapped, without turning around. ”Go home, forget what you saw here, take a bath and watch _Notting Hill_. Go to sleep after that and come in tomorrow as always.”

Ianto was horrified when Tosh nodded and turned to leave.

”Tosh!” he called.

”Close the door on your way out!” Owen called and the heavy door slammed shut. And Ianto realized that he really was in trouble. He reached up to activate the earpiece, but Owen grabbed his hand and yanked the device away. It dropped to the floor. Owen pinned Ianto to the wall.

”Owen-” 

”Let me in!”

Ianto screamed out when pain exploded in his head and he stared at Owen in horror when the doctor screamed out, too. He lost his balance and would have slipped to the floor if Owen hadn't been pinning him to the wall with all his strength and body. Tears clouded Ianto's vision and he felt his barriers crack under the onslaught. Owen's eyes were almost black in the dim light, his face a twisted mask. The doctor looked like he was in pain but he was able to grab Ianto's hands to hold them against the wall. Ianto tried to push Owen away with his mind, then with his body. If he lost now … 

”Owen, no!” he yelled and gasped when the onslaught got stronger.

”Let me in!” Owen hissed. ”Let me see the truth, huh?”

Dark spots were dancing in front of Ianto's eyes. He squeezed his eyes shut and tried to concentrate, tried to push the invisible force away that was pushing against his mind. But he had been tired to begin with – the last few days putting a strain on him – and his head hurt and he was trembling. Owen was strong. Stronger than he should be for someone who had never set foot into Torchwood One and one of the psi training courses. He couldn't let him win. ”Please,” he whispered. Owen answered by shoving him against the wall with renewed force. The doctor could feel that he was close. Ianto's barriers were crumbling. So close. 

He laughed even though his face was tear-stained and marred by pained lines. He'd never been so far into Ianto's mind before and the strain on his body, on his own mind, was almost overwhelming. Yes, 21st century bodies weren't made for this. But Owen didn't care. Ianto gasped.

”This feels good,” Owen muttered, realizing that he got stronger the more he chipped away at Ianto's barriers. 

Ianto could feel his strength draining away. He stared at Owen in disbelief. ”Owen.” 

The doctor grimaced and took a deep breath, stealing himself. Then he slammed through Ianto's barriers. Owen screamed out in surprise when the force pushing against him vanished. He stared into Ianto's eyes, suddenly weak and empty and laughed. It faded away to a giggle when the high hit him. ”This is great. Great. Great.” On an impulse, he crushed his lips to Ianto's and laughed when he let go of Ianto's hands and the younger man scrabbled for his shoulders, returning the kiss just like Owen wanted him to.

After a minute, Owen pushed him back against the wall. ”Stop it, idiot!” He didn't know who he was talking to. ”What should I do with you?” he asked himself. His grip on Ianto's mind vanished and Ianto snapped back into full consciousness. One look at Owen and he remembered what had happened. In his attempt to get way from the other man, he smacked his head against the wall. He felt strange and something wasn't quite right and then he realized that his barriers were still down. He tried to raise them but he was exhausted, hurting all over and he had a splitting headache. He couldn't remember what to do any more. It felt as if someone had rearranged his mind and it scared him. Owen let him slide to the floor. ”Poor weak Ianto! The boss' lap dog! I can't believe that Jack trusted you. I can't believe that you are so lonely that you would be willing to let him shag you again! How pathetic!” he spat. 

Ianto gasped and tried to reach his earpiece but Owen kicked him in the stomach and crushed the earpiece under his foot. ”Don't do that. I'm the winner, Ianto. I control you, you see?” Owen giggled. ”There's nothing you can do.” He turned away from Ianto and the archivist curled up on the floor, trying to breathe through the pain. Owen turned back to him, saw the pained look and the tears and laughed. ”Now, tell me, what should I do with a traitor like you?” He stilled suddenly and a pensive look crossed his face. Then he smiled. ”Oh yeah.” He giggled. ”I know just the thing.”

***

Gwen panted and helped Jack to drag the unconscious Weevil into the cell. As soon as the door was closed and the Weevil safely enclosed behind it, Gwen groaned and stretched. ”Those things need to lose weight,” she said. 

Jack nodded grimly. ”Let's find out why Tosh isn't answering when I call her.”

Gwen grimaced. ”I'm sure there's a good reason.” 

They made their way up the stairs, Jack in an angry huff that made his coat flap behind him. ”Oh, and I'm pretty sure the parents of those teenagers would understand those reasons when their children would have just been mauled by a Weevil. They were lucky that we were able to catch up with it.” 

Gwen could understand Jack's rage, but she knew Tosh and the young woman was one of the most reliable persons on Earth. There had to be a good reason for her not to answer. Jack and Gwen had lost sight of the Weevil for a minute there and usually, Tosh would have helped them to find it with her all-knowing computers, but she hadn't answered when Jack had called her over his comm. Before Jack had time to try for either Ianto or Owen, they'd found the Weevil and were just in time to save a group of teenagers. Jack was furious nonetheless, ranting the whole way back to the Hub.

The main Hub was empty. She and Jack stood there for a few seconds, taking in the view.

”Weird,” Gwen said.

”Yeah. Where the hell is everyone?”

Something in the med bay clattered and there was a muffled groan. Gwen wanted to run for the bay, but Jack held her back. ”Weapon,” he whispered and pulled out his old-fashioned Webley.

”Right,” Gwen answered, getting a bit nervous. She still wasn't entirely used to her gun. Jack took point and headed for the med bay cautiously. He stopped pressed against the wall next to the door and Gwen took the other side. 

Jack nodded at her entered with his weapon ready to fire. He shoved it back into the belt when he realized what he was seeing. ”Ianto!” 

Gwen paled. She didn't put her weapon away, but continued to hold it at the ready, this time pointed towards the main Hub. Maybe she was being overly cautious, but she didn't know what was going on yet. Jack hurried down the stairs and knelt down beside Ianto, who was crouching against the tiled wall in tears, the waste basket in front of him. ”Jack!” he gasped and grabbed the captain's sleeve. ”Oh God, help me.” He gagged and heaved, but nothing came out. Ianto sobbed in frustration.

”What's wrong?” Jack asked.

”I tried to get it out, but it won't come out.”

Jack looked into the bin and saw that Ianto had already thrown up. ”Are you sick?” he asked urgently.

”No, I want to be,” Ianto answered and Jack was horrified when he shoved two fingers in his mouth and gagged again. But nothing came out. 

”Gwen,” Jack said, ”call Owen.” He grabbed Ianto's shoulders. ”Stop it, Ianto.”

”No, I have to get it out.”

”What?” Jack asked. ”Ianto, whatever it is, we'll work it out.”

Ianto sobbed. ”Retcon. I took Retcon.”


	14. Chapter 14

**14.**

 

“Owen's not answering,” Gwen said and Jack cursed. 

He tightened his hold around Ianto's waist and walked past Tosh's abandoned work station. ”C'mon. You can do it.” Ianto sagged against him, breathing heavily, but Jack forced him to keep going the same way they had been walking for almost half an hour now. ”Try again.” Ianto stumbled and Jack helped him to keep his footing. ”It's okay,” he whispered, pushing his own panic away to calm down an obviously upset Ianto. 

Ianto's hand was twisted in the material of Jack's coat, trying to keep himself upright. ”I'm so tired.”

”Keep on walking, Ianto. You can't fall asleep.”

Gwen called, ”Still not answering.”

”Try it again, Gwen!” Jack snapped. He helped Ianto cross the small bridge over the basin in the Hub and whispered, ”Ianto, don't fall asleep.”

”Won't change a thing,” Ianto answered.

They moved slowly, but Ianto managed to set one foot in front of another.

”Why the hell did you do that, Ianto?”

”Better off without me, sir.”

”I thought we talked about that.”

”Better off,” Ianto muttered and collapsed.

”No, Ianto.” Jack tried to get him up again, but Ianto wouldn't move. So Jack sat down on the cold tiles and pulled him to his chest, admitting defeat. 

Ianto's head fell against Jack's shoulder. ”Tea boy,” he whispered. ”Better off without the tea boy.” 

”That's not true,” Jack answered and buried his nose in the sweaty, dark hair. One hand cupped Ianto's nape and the other pulled him closer, wrapped around Ianto's waist. ”Ianto Jones,” he said. 

Gwen crouched next to him, her green eyes large and worried. ”Maybe we should try with the throwing up again.” 

Jack shook his head. ”Too late for that. All we can do is wait and hope that it won't be too bad.”

”How much did you take, Ianto?” Gwen asked. 

Ianto looked about ready to fall asleep. ”Five … or … six … I think.” 

”Damn,” Jack muttered. 

Gwen snapped her phone shut. ”He won't answer.” 

Jack glared at her. 

”Trying again,” she mumbled and left them, pressing her phone to her ear.

”Jack … this is bad,” Ianto said, looking up at him.

”I know.” Jack pulled him closer, wrapping his arms around him. ”I'll stay with you until it's over. It's okay. We'll deal with it.” He dropped a kiss on Ianto's forehead.

”Promise me that I can stay here … if I forget Torchwood. I want to stay here.”

”Then why the hell did you do that?” Jack asked furiously. 

Ianto shook his head. ”I don't know. I … I'm sorry.” 

Jack shook his head. ”It's my fault. I let you come back to work too soon.” Ianto's eyes drooped and Jack shook him slightly, not wanting him to fall asleep. ”Stay awake.”

Gwen returned. She was holding her phone to her ear and knelt down next to them. Her free hand grabbed one of Ianto's. ”What about a local hospital?” she asked.

”You are kidding, right?” Jack asked, then concentrated on Ianto again. 

Ianto was looking at him. ”May I say it, sir?” 

Jack took a deep breath. ”Oh God, Ianto. You don't have to.”

”Please, sir.”

Jack closed his eyes, then he nodded.

”I'm sorry, sir. For everything. For Lisa. For causing you to lose your trust in me.”

Jack nodded, forcing back tears. ”I know.” He leaned down. ”Apology accepted.” He caught Ianto's lips in a tender kiss. 

When he broke it, he kept his eyes closed, until Gwen said, ”He's asleep.”

He nodded. ”I know.”

”Should we wake him?”

”We can't,” he answered. ”Once Retcon gets to work, you can't stop it.”

Gwen hung up the cell and redialled. ”He's not answering.”

”Find Tosh,” Jack said. He gathered Ianto's body to his chest and got up with Gwen's help. ”It's too late now anyway. We can only hope that he was able to get enough of it out of his system by throwing up.” 

”So, he took five or six pills. That means he'll only lose five days, right?”

Jack shook his head. ”The more you take, the more you lose. Five or six pills … he could lose up to five years.” 

Gwen just looked after him as he carried Ianto to the couch.

***

There had to be a good reason for him to lie in an alleyway on the rain-wet ground in the middle of the night, but for the life of him, Owen couldn't remember it. His phone was ringing, his head was hurting so bad that he checked if a chainsaw was wedged in it and he felt exhausted. 

He groaned and reached into his jeans pocket for his phone. By the time he'd found it, it had stopped ringing. He squinted at the display, aside from the dim street lamp the only source of light, and cursed. He'd missed thirty-two calls from the Hub. Thirty-two. What the hell was going on there? 

He got to his feet slowly and stumbled. He was going to be sick, if he didn't die first. 

”What the fuck did I drink?” he whispered. He managed to leave the alleyway without throwing up and was standing on a street he recognized, about half-way between his flat and the Hub. He was just pushing the right buttons to call the Hub back when a car stopped next to him. 

The driver window was rolled down and Tosh looked at him from the passenger seat. ”Where have you been?”

Blearily, he realized that Gwen was sitting behind the wheel, glaring at him. He felt strangely detached from his body. ”I ...” 

”Get in. Now.” Tosh sounded uncharacteristically harsh. He scrabbled for the door handle and got into the back seat. He was shaking all over, feeling sick and confused. What had happened? 

Gwen accelerated and Owen felt his senses fly out Gwen's still open window. 

”We tried to call you. Where have you been? We needed you back at the Hub,” Gwen ranted. ”Damn it, Owen! Were you out there getting drunk?”

”No,” he said, not sure if he was telling the truth.

”Answer your phone the next time.”

He hated it when she got all bossy. It made him defensive. ”Shut up, Gwen!”

”I won't. We had to trace your phone to track you down. Do you have any idea how mad Jack is right now?”

He had an idea. Jack wasn't a strict boss, he didn't have many rules. But one of them was 'Answer your phone'. Well, fuck! Whatever had happened, he really hoped it had been worth it.


	15. Chapter 15

**15.**

 

Jack was nowhere to be seen when they entered the Hub. Tosh sat down at her computer while Gwen followed Owen to the med bay and said, ”Jack and Ianto are in Jack's room.”

Owen smirked. ”Getting it on?” The shove Gwen gave him nearly sent him toppling down the stairs of the med bay. He whirled around. ”What the fuck did you do that for?”

”Just stop it, you asshole! It's jokes like this one that made Ianto do it!”

”Do what?” Owen asked.

”He took Retcon. He took enough Retcon to wipe out the past five years.”

Owen felt sucker-punched.

”You just couldn't stop, right? Always making fun of him and-”

”Hey! I wasn't the only one who didn't trust him after Lisa. As I remember, you were the one who told Jack that we should lock him up.” Gwen bit her lip, tears in her eyes. He didn't stop there, tired and confused and angry as he was. ”You were the one who asked Jack if we shouldn't use Retcon. That wasn't my idea.”

”I didn't mean it that way.”

”The hell you didn't! How come that I'm always the bastard around here?” 

Tosh joined them with her arms crossed, glaring. ”Take your pick, Owen,” she said. ”I'm not surprised that Ianto did it, the way you were treating him.”

”So it's my fault?” Owen asked. ”What about him? Maybe he just couldn't take it any more that his girlfriend was dead, huh? Maybe that was the reason for him doing this.” He should know. After Katie's death, he'd wished more than once for something like an amnesia pill. He slapped the autopsy table. ”I'm sick and tired of you lot. Maybe I'll take some Retcon home with me and leave this fucking city for good!”

Gwen snorted. ”Please do, Owen.”

”Enough!”

They turned around to Jack. He was standing there, in the entrance of the med bay, with his arms crossed over his chest. He was wearing a t-shirt and his trousers, the braces hanging down. 

He glared at all of them. ”Shut up! I can't take this any more! Look at you!” He turned away. ”I don't know what I'm doing here any more,” he muttered and Tosh ducked her head, pulling up her shoulders. Gwen was still glaring at Owen and he raised his eyebrows, daring her to say something. Jack turned around to them, addressing the doctor. ”Where the hell have you been? Pick up your phone. That's not too difficult, is it?”

Owen ducked his head.

”Ianto's in my room. Check on him. Make sure that he's alright.”

Owen grabbed his bag and brushed past the captain to his office. He'd known that Jack had a bedroom under his office but he was climbing down the ladder for the first time now. The room was bare, impersonal; just a bed, a bedside table and a closet. On a hanger on the door was Ianto's suit. Bare concrete walls. The room was a bunker, really. 

Ianto, dressed in a t-shirt and sweatpants, was sleeping peacefully in Jack's bed and Owen perched on the edge of it to assess him. While Owen was listening to Ianto's heartbeat, he tried to calm down. The fight was running through his head again and he wondered what was wrong with all of them. 

”You're doing fine, tea boy,” he said softly and for the first time in what felt like ages, he felt calm. It was quiet down here. Ianto's soft breaths were the only thing to be heard and Owen realized just how tired he was. He didn't want to go up the and face Jack or Gwen or even Tosh. He wanted to curl up next to Ianto and sleep for a week. He felt drained and void of emotion. There was an insistent buzz starting in the back of his head and even though it didn't hurt, Owen felt tears gathering in his eyes. Looking at Ianto sleeping peacefully, Owen just knew that something had happened. Something terrible. He couldn't remember anything past Jack and Gwen leaving to go on a hunt. And that scared him.

***

When Owen was gone, calm entered the main Hub. Jack watched the doctor leave before he addressed Tosh. "Where have you been?"

Tosh paled and Gwen clenched her hands into fists. "This is hardly the perfect timing, Jack."

"Owen's here and checking on Ianto. It's the perfect timing." He looked at Tosh invitingly.

"I …" She stopped and ducked her head, ashamed. 

Jack put his hands on his hips. His voice was cold and there was an undercurrent of exhaustion in it as if he couldn't bear to be let down all the time. "It's old news that Owen's unreliable sometimes. I just didn't expect something like that from you of all people." Gwen took a breath to say something but Jack raised his hand. "Don't say it, Gwen." 

She turned away and stalked to her desk in a huff. Tosh crossed her arms. "I'm sorry," she whispered and looked up at him with tears in her eyes. "I don't know why I did it."

Jack looked at her for a long time, his forehead creased into a frown and his hands on his hips. "Come," he said finally and headed for his office. Tosh followed him hesitantly and stopped just inside the door, not sure what to do with herself. The office was almost dark, the only light coming from Jack's desk lamp and the computer screen. The blinds were closed, barring the main Hub's bright lights. Jack crouched down looked into his bedroom. "Are you done, Owen?"

The doctor startled and got up from his position on the edge of the bed. "Yeah," he said. He climbed the ladder and stopped in front of Jack. “He's fine. His vitals are good. He's deep asleep but that's to be expected with Retcon.“

Jack nodded. Owen seemed to want to say something but he stopped himself, nodded hastily and left the room. He closed the door on his way out.

"Sit down," Jack said and pointed to one of the chairs in front of his desk. She did so and looked up at Jack who was leaning against his desk. 

"Toshiko," Jack said, "Ianto was forced to take Retcon."

Her eyes widened. "What? But …" She stopped. "The intruder? But Ianto didn't have a psi shock, did he?"

"No. Because the intruder was successful. Ianto's barriers are down. I checked while you were out getting Owen."

"We still don't know who did this?"

"No idea. But there aren't many people who could have done it, because humans from the 21st century can't do something like this without the proper psi training and even if they'd had training it's almost impossible." He crossed his arms. "Look at the CCTV footage from tonight and take a good look. Each and every camera."

She nodded. "If Gwen and Owen help me, I could-"

"No, they won't."

Tosh looked at him in puzzlement. "Jack?" 

He stood up and sat down in his chair. "I want you to listen to me and to not ask any questions."

She nodded.

"I've widened my mental barriers to protect you. Nobody can get into your head without me noticing. You look at the CCTV. Gwen and Owen can't know about this because if they do, the intruder could read it in their minds."

"Couldn't you just include them into your barriers, too?"

"That would weaken my barriers and we don't want that. We have to know if he was in the Hub, okay? It's weird that you and Owen left the base and both of you don't seem to know why. We know that the intruder isn't here now but he could have come down here after you two left. He must appear somewhere on the CCTV and maybe we'll be able to see what he wants or if he took something. Focus on Ianto, too. Maybe the intruder wasn't here in person but used Ianto's body. Scan the base for everything you can – booby traps, technology, everything."

Tosh nodded. 

Jack slumped in his chair. "I'm sorry that you have to do it on your own but … I can't protect more than two people besides me at the same time. I need your tech knowledge and as soon as Ianto wakes up, he'll need my barriers, too." 

"I can't work on my computer. Gwen and Owen will see what I'm doing."

He nodded. "Use Ianto's computer in the tourist office." 

She got up and was prepared to leave, but then she stopped. Jack seemed to be so lost and tired. She'd never seen him like that before. He was staring into space, the glare of his computer cutting shadows on his face. She hesitated, then she walked a few steps towards him. ”Jack?”

He looked at her, wiping his hand across his lips. ”Tell me the truth,” he said suddenly. ”When did I lose control? What did I do wrong?”

She sighed deeply. ”I don't know.”

”Was it when I re-built Torchwood Three from scratch? When I hired Suzie or Owen? You? Ianto? Maybe when I started to sleep with him? When Suzie killed herself? When I hired Gwen? When I ordered you to kill Lisa?” He looked at her, utterly defeated. ”Because the team's broken and I'm not able to fix it. We're fighting, irritating each other, not trusting each other … look what happened.”

Tosh rounded the desk and came to stand next to Jack. She hopped onto the desktop and looked at him attentively.

”I wanted this to be the reason to get up each morning. I wanted this to be different from the Torchwood we had before. I wanted this to be your anchor. There's so much shit going on outside … I … wanted you to feel safe here. To have something akin to a family. This almost feels like 1999.” 

Tosh knew what had transpired on new year's eve at the end of the twentieth century. The reports stated that Torchwood leader Alex Hopkins had shot everyone, leaving Jack in charge. 

He stared at her. ”I was too much of a friend or a father … or a lover. I have to be more of a leader.”

”I for one think that you're a terrific leader,” Tosh answered. ”You just lost your way. We all do. And families fight, Jack. They fight and they end up not talking to each other but they always come back.” She reached out to brush a hand down his cheek. He took her hand and kissed the palm. Then he closed his eyes and leaned back in the chair. 

***

Jack sighed deeply and brushed Ianto's hair out of his forehead. “Ianto?“

He didn't stir. Jack rubbed his face with his hands and got up. He climbed up the ladder and left his office. He found Owen in the main Hub, his head on his arms and asleep at his desk. Jack tapped his shoulder and Owen startled awake before checking his watch. He groaned. “It isn't even 6am, Jack.”

Gwen sat up on the couch where she'd taken a nap.

“He's still asleep,” Jack said.

Owen cleared his throat. “It's been six hours. He needs more time.” Jack just stared at him and Owen sighed before he wiped the last remains of sleep from his eyes. “Is he breathing alright?”

Jack nodded. 

“Then he's sleeping,” Owen said. “Skip the drama.”

Jack's eyes narrowed. “Drama?” His voice had a dangerous edge to it and Owen pushed his chair back a few centimetres to put some distance between them. “This drama wouldn't be necessary if you'd been here, Owen.”

Owen ducked his head.

”I needed you right here. Ianto needed you right here.”

”He took Retcon,” Owen said, feeling defensive. ”There was nothing I could have done.”

”You could have tried. And that's no reason not to answer your phone, Owen. It could have been Gwen bleeding to death. I'm sick and tired of your _can't be bothered_ -attitude of the last few weeks. Of being criticized because of my decisions concerning Ianto. Of you taking it out on him.” 

Jack stared at Owen and the doctor swallowed.

“I ...” He stopped. “I'm sorry, okay?” he asked. “I didn't hear the phone.”

Jack wanted to yell at him but he reminded himself that, maybe, it really hadn't been Owen's fault. Somebody had sent Tosh and him out of the Hub and they could be responsible for everything that had happened after that, too. But Gwen didn't know that. “You've been drunk, right?” she asked.

Jack looked at her. “Stop it, Gwen,” he said. She seemed hurt by that but then she just shrugged, picked up her jacket and her bag from the floor and headed for the door. 

“Where do you think you're going?” Jack asked.

She raised her eyebrows – a challenge. “Home. To see Rhys. I have a life outside of Torchwood, you know?”

Jack crossed his arms. “Not at the moment, you don't. We have to work this situation out first.”

“There's nothing we can do, you said so yourself. I have barely been home for days. I'm tired and we're stuck.”

“Nobody's leaving this base,” Jack said and Gwen stared at him in disbelief before crossing her arms.

“Are we prisoners now, too?”

Jack glanced at her tiredly and turned away.

“Don't you need two signatures to make it official?” she wanted to know. 

Jack stopped. Gwen was just tired, he knew that. That didn't change that he felt attacked and he couldn't stand that feeling. He forced himself to speak calmly. ”You're the new girl, Gwen. It's not your place to tell me how to lead my agents. If I decide to activate Protocol 39, then I'm going to do it.”

”But it isn't right-”

”That's the point! You have no idea what is right at the moment, Gwen, because you have no idea what kind of sick creatures are waiting just on the other side of the Rift.” He turned around to face her.

She stared at him defiantly. ”You hired me for the human point of view.”

”And you're all over it, right? Constantly telling us how not human we are. I didn't lock Ianto up in a cell to beat him daily. I just took his authority and confined him to the Hub after I talked to him about it and he consented. It was his idea, damn it!”

Silence descended and Jack sighed. “I want you to stay because it's safer. There's someone out there capable of manipulating you and they seem to have a problem with Torchwood.” He went to his office and slammed the door. Then he cursed quietly and looked down into his bedroom. Ianto had turned on his side but he was still sleeping. Then, while Gwen was calling Rhys to apologize for not being home and to explain that he wouldn't see her the whole day, either, Jack sat down at his desk and buried his head in his hands.


	16. Chapter 16

**16.**

 

There was a concrete ceiling above him, Ianto realized, and he was warm and comfortable. That didn't make sense. He should be feeling nauseous, the ceiling should be painted white and his neck should be stiff. Because he'd been sleeping on the couch for days. It was closer to the bathroom. 

His eyes slid closed again and he relaxed, deciding not to care. Maybe he was dreaming. Fingers brushed through his hair and he smiled. Lisa. 

”Ianto?” 

He opened his eyes again and stared at the man sitting beside him, looking worried and stroking his hair. He wasn't dreaming after all. What had happened?

”Jack?” 

A smile touched Jack's lips. ”Thank God,” he muttered.

”What happened?” Ianto asked. ”What am I doing in your bed?”

Jack grew serious. ”Listen to me, Ianto. You took Retcon. You have to tell me what is the last thing you remember.” 

Ianto swallowed, panic settling in. ”Retcon? I don't remember taking ...”

”Sh!” Jack interrupted him. ”The last thing you remember.”

Ianto closed his eyes. ”I was … at home. Suspension. Getting sick all the time.”

”Okay,” Jack said. ”You lost a few weeks.” And he was glad that Ianto hadn't lost his memories around Lisa's death. He wouldn't have wanted to explain that to him.

”Weeks?” Ianto asked. 

Jack nodded. Ianto sat up slowly.

”Oi!” Jack cautioned him. ”I think you should rest.”

”I'm fine,” Ianto answered. He grimaced when a dull pain throbbed through his shoulder and noticed a bandage. 

”Myfanwy,” Jack explained. ”Almost healed.” 

”How long have I been sleeping?”

”Several hours,” Jack answered. Ianto got up slowly, then, suddenly, he gripped Jack's arm. 

”What is it?” the captain asked, worried.

”Something's missing. Jack … I … my barriers … my mental barriers ...” Ianto's voice was shaking. 

Jack put a hand on his shoulder. ”It's okay.”

”What happened?”

”I'll tell you in a bit,” Jack answered. 

Ianto went into a corner of the room, crossing his arms protectively. Jack could understand the emotions running through Ianto's head. Jack was used to his mental barriers, he felt safe behind them. The thought of anyone being able to just waltz into his head scared him. And clearly, Ianto, too. People who had never learned how to build a mental line of defence couldn't imagine what it felt like to have it ripped away - it was like being naked in the middle of a battle-field. 

Ianto closed his eyes and concentrated, then he stared at Jack helplessly. ”I can't raise them.” He made a distressed noise and pushed his back against the wall. 

Jack joined Ianto in his corner and curled a hand around the nape of his neck. ”Sh!” he said and closed his eyes, touching his forehead to Ianto's. ”Let me.” He reached out to Ianto's mind and extended his own barriers. He was protecting Ianto's mind now, too. It wasn't perfect and it weakened Jack's own barriers but it would do for the time being. 

Ianto's posture relaxed and he sighed deeply. 

Jack smiled. ”That should do until you're strong enough to rebuild your own.”

Ianto nodded and looked up at him. ”Thank you.”

***

“Jack,” Tosh said and smiled fleetingly at Ianto who was sitting opposite Jack in the captain's office. ”You alright?” she asked.

”I think so,” he answered.

”What have you got?” Jack asked. 

Tosh closed the door. “I checked all the cameras and I couldn't find an un-authorized person in the Hub.”

Ianto rubbed his forehead. “He used me?” he asked. Jack had explained everything to him by now. 

Tosh nodded. “There are blank spaces where video footage should be so someone deleted it. There are videos of you sitting at my computer, Ianto. You were the one who deleted that footage.”

Jack cleared his throat to gain back Tosh's undivided attention. “What's missing?”

“Footage from the archives, the corridors and the med bay. I checked our security system. Everything. Nothing was brought in here, Jack. No booby traps or anything like that. I can't say if there's something missing in the archives but the armoury wasn't opened. Neither were the rooms where we keep dangerous technology.”

Jack let out a relieved breath. “That's good news.”

Tosh nodded. “But I did find something,” she said. “My systems detected it a few days ago.” She pushed past Jack to his computer and opened an analysis programme. “Here, have a look at that.”

Jack did. “Okay … what am I looking at?”

She smiled. “It's a small energy spike. Very small, that's why the alarm didn't go off. I didn't notice it. I only found it because I was looking for it.”

Ianto came around the desk and leaned over Jack's shoulder to look at the screen. He frowned. “Jack,” he said.

The captain turned his head to look at him. “What is it?”

“The date.” Ianto reached for the keyboard and closed the programme. Instead, he opened the CCTV and then a video. 

Tosh was sitting at her desk, working. Ianto joined her and put a box on her desk. 

Ianto paused the video. “That's the day.”

“But it's the wrong time,” Tosh said. Ianto fast forwarded almost two hours and then hit Play. 

Owen was sitting next to Tosh now, going through the box. Then, he took something. 

Tosh hit Pause. “5.21pm. That's the time the energy spike happened.”

“I had a look at that box,” Jack said. “There wasn't anything dangerous.”

“It's small,” Ianto said. “Maybe you just missed it.”

Jack stared at the screen. He zoomed closer to the object and rubbed his finger over his lower lip. “No way,” he said. “I remember finding that thing. That was during the … a while ago. I found it and packed it into one of the boxes, intending to label it later on.”

“You forgot,” Ianto said drily. “How many of those artifacts did you just forget? Do you have any idea how much work I put into identifying them?”

“Funny. That's what our former archivist told me,” Jack grinned, then he frowned. “He died shortly after. We didn't hire someone to do it until you came along.”

“What is it?” Tosh asked to get the men back on topic.

“It's an aide. It helps you to manipulate people via mind control,” Jack explained. “It didn't activate when I found it, because ...” He hesitated. His team didn't know anything about his past and he intended to keep it that way. “Because I already knew how to do it,” he answered vaguely.

“It activated because Owen can't do it and he touched it,” Ianto added. 

Jack nodded. ”Thing is, those stones establish a direct link with their users. If we destroy the stone, Owen will lose the ability to manipulate others. Problem is, he won't just hand it over. Once someone uses it, they develop a kind of addiction.” Their eyes raised and found Owen at his desk, his head on his arms, sleeping. Then he suddenly jerked and got up, running towards the bathroom. Jack looked at his two team mates. ”Now listen to me. I know what we're going to do.”

***

_The dimly lit corridors that led down to the archives … the way was getting longer … he ran._

_Ianto stared at him surprise._

_”Look what I found.”_

_In shock._

_”Owen, you're scaring me.”_

_”Let me take a look into your mind.”_

_Ianto screamed, staring at Owen in horror. A rush, an incredible high. It hurt, but it felt so good at the same time._

_”This is great. Great. Great.”_

Owen gasped and woke. Nausea slammed into him and ran for the bathroom, ignoring Gwen's worried voice. He made it just so, heaving over the toilet, tears running down his face. ”Oh God!” He'd done it. He'd been the one. Ianto had never decided to take Retcon. Owen had made him do it. He'd even watched. 

It had felt incredible to break those barriers, to break Ianto. 

But it was wrong. So wrong. 

He had to do it again. Now.

When he left the bathroom, Gwen was waiting in the corridor. “Owen, are you alright?” she asked.

He nodded. “Sure.”

She followed him back to the main Hub. “Are you ...” The question died on her lips as they entered the room. Jack was standing in front of the med bay, his Webley pointing at the doctor. Owen and Gwen stopped in their tracks and stared at him in surprise. Gwen asked, ”Jack, what's going on here?” 

Jack ignored her and addressed Owen. ”Hand it over,” he said. 

Owen tilted his head to the side. A cruel smile twisted his lips. ”No.” 

Jack swallowed. ”I will shoot you.”

”I don't think you will,” Owen answered. Gwen pointed her gun at Jack's head, manipulated by Owen. She walked towards him and pressed the weapon against his temple. 

”Owen,” Jack said, ”you don't want to do this.”

Owen smiled and looked towards Jack's office. ”Ianto! Tosh! Come and join us, will you?” He looked back at Jack. ”Don't think that I can't feel your shields protecting them. I'm not that stupid. You had no idea that it was me, did you?”

Jack watched Ianto emerging from his office, then Tosh. Owen spoke but didn't look at them, ”If you move Gwen will kill Jack.”

Ianto swallowed and Tosh stepped closer to him. Her hand brushed the pocket of Ianto's sweatpants and he felt the syringe against his leg. While Owen had been in the bathroom, Tosh and Ianto had fetched two syringes with sedatives from the med bay. Ianto really hoped that Jack's plan would work. 

Jack felt Owen push against his barriers and he saw Tosh sway. Ianto's hand on her back steadied her.

”You're incredibly strong,” Owen said. 

Jack shrugged. ”You're not so bad yourself. Never received any training yet you managed to break into Ianto's mind. No, wait ...” He smiled. ”You had help.”

Owen pulled the stone from his jeans pocket. ”Neat, isn't it?”

”It's pretty cool,” Jack agreed. Owen made a step towards him and Jack tightened his hold around his Webley. 

Owen stopped. ”It's going to be fun, breaking you I mean.” His mind was pushing against Jack's, looking for gaps in his barriers, not yet attacking, just scouting. He tilted his head. ”Your shields are so different.”

”Yeah,” Jack said. ”Don't expect me to get a psi shock, either. I'm way beyond that.”

”You're going to be a challenge,” Owen said. ”But I'll break you, piece by piece. I'm going to do Toshiko before you, you know. But I'll start with your lapdog.” Ianto cried out and Jack felt Owen push against his shields with more force now. He squeezed his eyes shut for a second and ignored the way the Hub's lights seemed painfully bright all of a sudden. Jack heard Ianto fall to the ground and a pained whimper but he couldn't risk turning around to check on him. Keeping the shields raised was putting a strain on him. Owen was stronger than he'd anticipated and he was laughing. ”This feels great, Jack,” he said. The captain didn't even recognize the man standing in front him, so he fired. The bullet hit Owen's arm and he dropped the stone. Owen pressed a hand to his wound and the pressure against Jack's shields lessened. 

Jack knew that Owen was too preoccupied with his wound to keep control of Gwen when there was a muffled scream behind Jack and then Gwen said, ”Oh God, what's happening?”

He turned around to her and wrenched the gun from her grip, then he pushed her towards Owen. He couldn't trust her and he couldn't risk losing any more of his shields to protect her. The small amount of time he'd needed to do that had been too much. When he turned back to face Owen, the doctor was already attacking him with his body and mind. 

Jack dropped his gun when Owen's body slammed into his and then he was on the ground, wrestling with Owen while trying to push his mind away. He couldn't concentrate and he felt his control over the shields slipping through his fingers like sand. ”Tosh!” he called. She'd been crouching beside Ianto who was holding his head. Now, she got up, pulled the syringe from its hiding place in the back pocket of her jeans and charged towards Owen. She was stopped by Gwen who pushed her to the ground, now under Owen's control once again. Jack lost sight of her but it sounded like one hell of a fight. He tried to grab Owen's hands and succeeded in rolling them around so that Owen was on the ground.

”Jack!” Ianto called and Jack saw him staggering to his feet. Owen strengthened his attack and Ianto and Jack cried out. Ianto collapsed and Jack lost his grip on Owen. Before he knew it, he was lying on the ground and Owen hit him in the face repeatedly. 

Then his hands closed around Jack's throat. ”I'll kill you,” he said. Jack grabbed his hands but he couldn't pry them away from his throat because the mental attack was too strong. Jack realized that Owen didn't seem to have any difficulties in controlling Gwen while he attacked Ianto and through him, Jack. God, he was so strong. One of the women cried out. Jack saw Ianto crawling towards him and Owen, the syringe in his hand, a desperate expression on his face. His vision began to swim out of focus and he realized that if he died now, Ianto and Tosh would lose his protection. There was the sound of something being crunched against the tiled floor, then shattering and Owen screamed. The attack on Jack's mind vanished suddenly and then Ianto was grabbing Owen and jamming the syringe into his thigh. Jack sat up and pulled Owen towards him when the doctor tried to kick Ianto but his strength lessened and he slumped in Jack's arms. ”Please,” he whispered. ”Help me.” Then he passed out. Jack looked at Tosh, who was standing next to an unconscious Gwen, the syringe in her hand. Broken glass was under her shoe and Jack realized that she had broken the stone.

”You alright?” Jack asked. She wiped blood from her lip and nodded. Ianto moaned and buried his face in his hands. Jack put a hand on his shoulder. 

”Ianto?” 

”It hurts.”

”It'll stop soon.”

Tosh knelt down beside him. ”Psi shock?”

Jack shook his head. ”I can't get psi shock. And it was me who was protecting you, so ...”

Tosh breathed a sigh of relief. ”Damn,” she whispered. ”Gwen's gonna hate me for that black eye I gave her.”


	17. Chapter 17

**17.**

 

Rhys was in their kitchen, surrounded by everyday things and a bit of a mess because they were both not very orderly people and it was so beautiful and normal that Gwen's eyes got wet. When Gwen stepped into Rhys' line of sight, he smiled at her. ”Hello, gorgeous!” He closed the refrigerator door and opened a bottle of beer. ”You're home. I thought you'd pull another all-nighter.”

”Tough case,” she muttered.

”Yeah,” Rhys answered. ”I guessed as much. Hey, let us order take-out and watch that Sandra Bullock flick you love so much. Call it an early night so that you can get back to work relaxed tomorrow.” Gwen sobbed. Horrified, Rhys put the bottle down and went to hug her. ”Gwen? Sweetie?” That was when he noticed the cut just under her eyebrow and the beginnings of a black eye. ”Jesus. What happened?”

She buried her face in his shirt and clung to him.

”What is it?” Rhys asked. ”Gwen, what is it?”

***

“How could it have been Owen all along?” Tosh asked softly, not really expecting an answer. 

Ianto shrugged. He sat down on the couch and dropped his over-night bag beside his feet. Jack had sent him home with Tosh, explaining that he would clean up and look after Owen. Ianto had been reluctant to leave him alone but Jack had insisted. He'd even assured Ianto that their shared barriers would stay until his mind had recovered from the attack. Ianto could only guess how much energy it must cost Jack to share his barriers over the distance that was between the Hub and Tosh's flat. 

He sighed deeply. ”I don't even remember the last few weeks.”

Tosh handed him a glass of water and a pain pill before she sat down on the couch beside him. She was exhausted, but she wanted to make sure that Ianto was alright before she went to bed. ”Jack thinks that the team's broken beyond repair.” She sighed. ”He thinks it's his fault.”

”Because he's the leader,” Ianto said. 

Tosh nodded. 

He asked, ”What if he's right?”

Tosh looked at him. ”He isn't,” she said. She pulled her legs up on the couch and leaned into Ianto. 

He put an arm around her shoulders. ”That won't stop him from wondering.”

***

Jack leaned his head against the plastic wall that separated him from Owen's cell. The doctor stared at him darkly. ”I need it back,” he said.

”You can't have it,” Jack answered. ”It's destroyed.”

”I need it,” Owen answered. 

Jack shook his head. ”Doesn't matter.”

Owen slammed his body against the plastic. ”You're killing me!”

Jack didn't even flinch.

”Go away if you don't want to help me!”

”I'll stay.”

”Go! Leave me alone ...” Owen turned away. ”... like everybody else.” He sank to the floor with his head in his hands. 

Jack sighed. ”I'll stay.”

***

“You should have seen him. Jack was so angry,” Gwen whispered and leaned into Rhys who was sitting on the couch beside her. ”Am I overeager? Do you think he's right?”

”You can be pretty stubborn,” Rhys answered.

”I didn't even notice that one of us was … doing drugs. I mean … what kind of a friend does that make me?” 

Rhys sighed. ”You should think about transferring back to the police. This job … it's too much. I can feel you slipping away, spending more time with them than you do with me. It's eating you up.”

Gwen raised her head form his shoulder and looked at him earnestly. ”I love that job.”

He closed his eyes. ”Priorities, Gwen. Get them straightened out.”

***

“Sometimes it gets too much,” Tosh said, settling an arm around Ianto's waist and laying her had on his good shoulder. He was stretched out on her couch under the comforter – under her. The position wasn't new to them and it had never been about sex for them. They'd clicked from the very first moment they'd met. Both of them quiet and withdrawn, both of them curious and sharing a passion for old movies. She'd been with him during his suspension whenever she wasn't at work. That much Ianto remembered. 

”Sometimes,” he agreed. 

Tosh asked, ”Do you love him?”

Ianto swallowed. ”I … don't know. I don't think so.”

”But you're starting fall for him.”

It wasn't a question so Ianto didn't answer.

”He was really worried about you, you know.”

”Yes, I know.” He sighed. ”We … had something for a while there, before Lisa. I … I'm not gay. It's just … different.” He chuckled helplessly. ”I guess it doesn't matter any more because it's over.”

”I wouldn't be so sure about that. He adores you.”

Ianto didn't answer and Tosh realized that she'd already said too much. 

She sighed deeply. ”You're comfy. Do you mind if I just pass out here?”

He chuckled. ”Not at all.”

***

Owen was curled up against the plastic that separated him and Jack. His head was pounding and he felt the need reach a new peak. ”It hurts,” he said. 

Jack nodded. ”I know. But it'll pass. The amplifier's destroyed. You should feel better in a few hours.”

”I wanted to hurt you. So badly. I wanted to break you.”

”That wasn't you,” Jack answered. ”It was never you. You never wanted to hurt anyone, Owen, or you would have killed one of us. Somehow, you were still able to hold back. You kept a small bit of control.”

”You should give me Retcon.”

”I won't. I know you, Owen. You're not that guy who worked with us the last few days.”

Owen laughed helplessly. ”Somewhere deep within I am.”

Jack shook his head. ”There's a beast within all of us. We have to decide what to do about it.” He looked at Owen. ”Believe me, I know. I've done things … you wouldn't believe. Sometimes out of stupidity, sometimes out of love or out of hate.”

Owen stared at the floor. ”It was supposed to be fun.”

”Mind control is never fun, Owen. At least not in this century on this planet. That's why I don't want alien technology to leave the base. It's like giving cavemen a car. Maybe they can start it and drive around, but they're likely to kill or hurt innocents in the process.”

”Flattering,” Owen answered. 

Jack smiled. ”I do my best.”

***

Rhys was sleeping soundly, one arm wrapped around her. Gwen stared out of the window into the night, wondering what would happen tomorrow back at work. It wasn't going to be pleasant, that much was clear. She sighed deeply. But she wouldn't leave. Whatever had happened, she wasn't ready to leave Torchwood. She doubted that she ever would be.

***

Ianto turned the page and tried to make himself more comfortable, but with Tosh's body pinning him to the couch, that wasn't easy. She sighed in her sleep and tightened her hold around his waist. Ianto thumbed through his diary, trying to trigger his memory of the last few weeks. He knew it could be done. Gwen had done it. And he wanted to know where he and Jack were standing at the moment. If he'd been able to apologize to the captain. 

It hit him out of nowhere. A memory – Jack close to him, talking to him, inside of his mind. Experiencing the same memory and revisiting it with him. Feeling the affection and passion Jack linked with the memory. Jack experiencing Ianto's feelings.

Ianto gasped. Jack knew. The one thing Ianto didn't want him to know and Jack had found out. That Ianto felt something for him. Something bordering on love. He closed his eyes in defeat.

***

“How long will I have to stay here?” Owen asked. 

Jack sighed. ”The stone's destroyed. It's only addictive when it's still functioning. You're experiencing the last remnants of its effects. We'll wait until tomorrow to be sure, but I think you're feeling better. I take it you haven't been under the influence for too long?” He raised his eyebrows in question. 

Owen nodded slowly. ”No. A few days. And I feel better. The headaches fading away and … I don't crave a look into your mind right now.” He laughed helplessly and Jack forced a smile. Owen leaned his head back against the wall and stared into space. ”You can go now,” he muttered, not really wanting him to though. ”I'm alright.”

Jack shook his head. ”I'm pretty comfortable right now.” He looked at Owen. ”I think I'll stay a while.”

***

Owen woke curled up on the uncomfortable bed in the cell. It took a moment for him to realize that he wasn't alone. Ianto was sitting at the end of the bed, dressed in a suit and holding a mug of coffee out for Owen to take. 

”A little creepy,” the doctor said, ”but a sight to behold nonetheless.” He eagerly took the coffee. The cell door was open. 

Ianto noticed his curious stare and explained. ”Jack thinks that it's okay for you to leave the cell. But you have to remain in the Hub until late this afternoon to be absolutely sure that you're okay.” 

Owen sipped the coffee and closed his eyes with a sigh. ”Heaven,” he muttered. 

Ianto chuckled. ”It's my job after all.” He got up to leave.

Owen grabbed his arm. ”Ianto ...”

The archivist looked at him expectantly. 

Owen cleared his throat. ”Listen ...” He'd never been good at apologizing. He hated it. It made him vulnerable. But he knew that Ianto deserved it. ”I never meant to say those things. About … you know, whoring and stuff.” Ianto raised an eyebrow. Owen continued, ”You are … an okay guy and … I ...” Owen rolled his eyes. ”Do I have to do this? Ianto?”

The Welshman suppressed a smile, just so. ”Apology accepted.”

”Great,” Owen sighed. Ianto headed for the door. ”But, oh, hey! Ianto.” The archivist turned around to Owen and the doctor raised the mug. ”Thanks for the coffee.”

***

“It was an amplifier,” Jack said. He looked at his team sitting around the table in the boardroom. ”It helps races who don't have psychic abilities to reach out and read minds or control them. Humans, at this point in time, are not able to read minds. The amplifier detected that and helped Owen out.”

”Wait a second,” Gwen said. ”When you say that we don't have the ability, how come that Torchwood One was able to train people to deflect attacks?”

”Ah!” Jack said, raising his index finger. ”Right. Defending your own mind is not the same as reading minds or controlling someone. Humans start to develop that ability in the early 40th century when they start mingling with other races.”

Owen cleared his throat. ”What the device did, was essentially helping me out. I got stronger with every use but the nasty side effect was an addiction.”

”Typical,” Jack said. ”The amplifiers weren't restricted when they first came out. Turned out that humans and some humanoid races really shouldn't be allowed to use them. The amplifiers were deemed too dangerous for them, it has something to do with chemicals and hormones. Breaking into minds sets free endorphins. Normally not a problem, but the device amplifies that effect and essentially made those humanoid races crave another high. A better high.”

”Which was, in Owen's case, Ianto?” Tosh asked. Jack nodded, looking at the archivist. 

”I started out with you two and random people,” Owen explained. ”When I tried it out on Ianto I realized that it was harder to control him, but it felt better when I finally started to break through his defences.”

Ianto grimaced, but he didn't say anything.

”So, this is for sure, right?” Gwen asked. ”No intruder?”

”No intruder,” Jack answered. ”The amplifier's destroyed and we're safe.”

”You sure?” Gwen asked again. 

Jack nodded. 

She raised her eyebrows. ”That means that Ianto's no longer a prisoner, right?”

Jack smiled and shook his head. ”All sorted out.” He cleared his throat, becoming serious. ”Now, let's sort out something else. The last few weeks … hell, the last few months were a disaster. But they made me see that I wasn't doing a good job.” When Tosh went to contradict him, Jack raised a hand. ”Don't.” 

”But, Jack-”

”Don't,” he repeated. ”I don't want to talk about this in detail. I don't want to make a therapy session out of this meeting because I think that would be wrong. Just listen to me.” He put his hands on hips. ”Here's the deal: We ignore what happened. We ignore every hurtful word, every betrayal and every fight or argument or discussion. We don't forget them because that would be foolish but we try to see past them. We start with a clean slate – each and every one of us. And we'll be better than before. If anyone wants to leave Torchwood, say it now.” They all kept their gazes on the table and Jack nodded. ”Didn't think so. Does everyone agree to what I just said?” Small nods. ”Okay. Can everyone of you now look at me and give me a smile?” 

They did and Jack smiled back. 

”My kids,” he said. ”I've never been more proud.”

***

“Sir?” Ianto asked and stepped into Jack's office.

”Yeah?” 

Ianto held up some files. ”The reports on recent events.”

Jack nodded and Ianto stepped closer to put the folders on the table. Two days of work had passed, the Rift hadn't been acting up and they had all been buried in paperwork and projects. They'd been acting cautiously around each other at first, but they'd fallen back into routines, now – Gwen and Owen arguing over nothing, Tosh watching them quietly and sharing annoyed and amused glances with Ianto. Jack hadn't been this relaxed in weeks. 

”Sir.” 

Jack looked up at Ianto who seemed nervous all of a sudden and he raised his eyebrows questioningly. 

”I think … I was going through my diary, trying to trigger some memories.”

”Did it work?”

”Amazingly so,” Ianto answered with a small smile. ”Well ...” He sighed. ”I remember us … sharing that memory.”

Jack nodded. ”Yeah.” 

”I remember the … feelings you link with it.” 

Affection. Passion. Happiness. Jack was cherishing the memory, not looking back on it with bitterness. ”Yeah,” Jack said.

”You're not … I missed … anger or betrayal or something like that.”

Jack got up and came around his desk. ”You entrusted me with the most fragile thing humans have. You gave me permission to go through your mind. I could have done anything. Access memories or emotions, manipulate you ...” 

”I know, sir.”

”They taught you to never let your barriers down.”

”Yes, sir.” 

”But you did.”

”I trust you.”

”Right,” Jack said. ”There's your reason then.”

Gwen poked her head into the room. ”We're going out for drinks. You joining us?”

”Absolutely,” Jack nodded. 

He looked at Ianto who hesitated and after an encouraging smile from Jack shrugged. ”Sure.” 

”Okay, departure in ten minutes.” With that, she was gone. Ianto went to fetch Jack's coat and helped the captain into it. 

While he brushed the captain's shoulders, Jack said, ”We'll meet on the shooting range again as soon as your shoulder's healed.”

”Sir?” 

”I want you to be ready to accompany us in the field when needed. I'm changing your status from support to backup field agent. Which means that you'll need more training.” Ianto stared at him and Jack put a hand on his cheek. ”You're ready.” He turned away and headed for the door. 

”Sir,” Ianto said and Jack turned around. Ianto stepped closer. ”About the memory and … my feelings ...”

Jack grinned. ”Oh, Ianto Jones, let's just see what we're going to do about that.”

Ianto blushed. ”In time?”

Jack nodded. ”No rushing in ...” He kissed Ianto's forehead. ”I wanna do it right this time.”

 

END  
07/10


End file.
